


Perfect Love Design

by heros_wings



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: AU, Fluff, High School, Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-06
Updated: 2014-11-01
Packaged: 2018-02-07 15:46:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 28,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1904706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heros_wings/pseuds/heros_wings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaejoong is the most popular guy in school. He even has a fan club! Except Shim Changmin doesn't care. Jaejoong wants him to care.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> 100% dedicated to back-to-five, as it was written in response to this request: [ http://back-to-five.tumblr.com/post/90339205013/request-for-any-dbsk-author-who-has-nothing-better](http://back-to-five.tumblr.com/post/90339205013/request-for-any-dbsk-author-who-has-nothing-better)

"Everyone this is Shim Changmin, he just transferred, please show him a warm welcome."

Everyone except Jaejoong greeted the tall boy in unison. He would have joined in, but he was too busy staring at his long legs, wide shoulders, and perfect build. Even his mismatched eyes had a uniquely attractive appeal. And he looked extremely young to be in a third year class...

"He skipped a grade, so he is younger than all of you," their teacher continued, staring at the class with a stern expression. "I expect everyone to make him feel comfortable."

Jaejoong glanced down at the sketches he had been working on before their teacher came in with the model boy. Then he looked back up to study Changmin's figure again.

He was perfect. Beyond perfect. The outfit he designed was made for him. Sure, he was going to ask Yunho to model it - they were nearly the same height - but Yunho was too careless and ripped one-too-many of Jaejoong's creations while trying to show off a new dance move. This time, he would have the perfect model for his fall fashion show. A perfect model wearing his perfect designs. And then all that was left was graduation in the spring and becoming a famous designer.

Easy enough.

"Why don't you take an empty seat-"

Jaejoong's eyes darted to the desk just in front and diagonal of his. The perfect angle for staring at Changmin's side profile during class. Then he could start working on scarves, hats, and shirts that flattered his collarbones and shoulders...

_'Oh...he's walking over...'_

Jaejoong's heart sped up several beats, like he had just completed a hundred meter sprint. 

_'I should smile,"_ he tried catching the boy's eye and smiled, but Changmin ignored him and took his seat as he was instructed.

Jaejoong's eyes widened in horror.

_'He didn't even look at me!'_ he let out a soft, but audible whine. 

Yoochun, his best friend, looked over at him with a raised eyebrow, but Jaejoong ignored him. 

_'Why didn't he look at me?'_

His mind felt blank. This had never happened before. Everyone liked him. He even had a fan club! An all male fan club!

He was hot. Nice. He had the voice of an angel. He had amazing fashion sense. His hair was perfect - it was black, silky, and touched his shoulders. He even had piercings in his ears, navel, and nipple. And damn it he was popular!

_'It's ok...'_ he told himself, taking a deep breath. 

Changmin was new. He didn't know Jaejoong was the most popular guy in school. Or that everyone would have clawed Changmin's eyes out just to have Jaejoong smile at them.

Yes...

That was it...

He would just have to wait until lunch to properly introduce himself....

When lunch finally came, Jaejoong practically toppled over his desk trying to get to Changmin before he had the chance to escape. After all, he couldn't let the new kid eat alone, right? And if everyone saw him hanging out with Jaejoong, then Changmin would be popular by association. And then-

He tripped over his own feet in mid-thought, and reached out to grab the closest thing to keep him from taking a very undignified, extremely un-cool, nose-dive into the floor. Because Jaejoong walked and moved with a cat-like grace.

At school. 

The thing he clung to was Changmin's surprisingly solid and muscular arm. Jaejoong would have to make sure to design something that showed them off...

Changmin jumped at the sudden contact and flung his arm out to dislodge the weight that had latched onto him.

Jaejoong fell back and landed with an ungraceful thump. So much for his dignity. His butt now hurt, and he could hear Yoochun laughing behind him.

He whined again. Why was life unfair? He was good-looking, talented, and he had a fan club! He shouldn't be sitting on the floor in such an embarrassing state in front of the boy he decided just an hour ago would make him the most famous designer in South Korea.

Changmin blinked, looked down at Jaejoong, and tilted his head with a politely confused expression. "Um..."

Jaejoong leapt to his feet. He had to introduce himself before-

"Jaejoong-hyung!!"

He groaned inwardly.

Normally, on any other day, he would have beamed and greeted Siwan with enthusiasm - he was the newest member of his fan club after all. But not today. Today, Jaejoong just wanted to say hi to the boy that was going to model his clothes for the rest of their lives. And he couldn't do that until he told him his name.

He tried introducing himself quickly, but the moment he opened his mouth, Seung Hyun appeared, followed by a boy Jaejoong only knew as Zelo.

"Hyung! C'mon! You promised to have lunch with us today in the club room! My mom even made spicy chicken!"

Sighing, he gave Changmin an apologetic look and trudged off with his fan club. 

He supposed he could have invited him. But unless Changmin was interested in becoming a fan club member, he wasn't going to be welcomed. Even then, apparently there were a series of grueling tests he had to pass. Jaejoong didn't want to know so he didn't ask. The only friends his fan club seemed to approve of were Yoochun, Yunho, and Junsu. He had no idea why. Again, he didn't want to ask.

Maybe he could corner Changmin after school...

The moment the final bell rang, Jaejoong was seized by Junsu and Yunho, and dragged off towards the soccer fields. Because if Jaejoong was there, then girls would follow. And Yunho and Junsu were competing for the most fans, after Jaejoong, in the school. To do that, they needed girls.

Apparently.

Jaejoong didn't need girls.

Actually, as he gazed forlornly over his shoulder at Changmin, who was silently packing up his bag, he was pretty sure he didn't need friends. Well, he probably needed Yoochun. But definitely not the two currently dragging him away from his muse.

Maybe he could audition for new friends...

His two so-called friends plopped him on the grass in the midst of his fan club, who had come to watch Hyun Joong and Jun Hyung practice.

"Hyung!!"

Jun Hyung, a cute boy with a somewhat rounded face jogged up to him with a bright smile. He kind of reminded Jaejoong of those idols that all of his sisters were obsessed with.

"Did you come to watch me?"

Before Jaejoong could reply, Hyun Joong, the fan club president (and admittedly, Jaejoong's favorite), jogged over as well and lightly smacked the other boy on the head. "Of course he didn't. Yunho and Junsu need him to attract girls to practice." He offered Jaejoong a sympathetic grin. "I told them not to do it, but..." he shrugged. "Anyway since you're here cheer us on, ok?" He flashed Jaejoong a perfect smile and jogged off.

Hyun Joong was almost as good looking as he was, and probably the fourth most popular guy in their year. He even managed to dye his hair a pretty golden blond without getting in trouble because his parents were rich and donated a ridiculous amount of money to the school. Why he continued the fan club was beyond Jaejoong. Not that he was complaining...

"Hyung?" A boy Jaejoong knew as LeeU scooted in front of him. Why were all his fanboys so cute? Jaejoong couldn't possibly dislike any of them...

He smiled to show he was listening.

LeeU took a deep breath, like having Jaejoong's full, undivided attention was more than anyone could ever hope for...and he was right. If only he could get Changmin to see that too...

"I-bought-this-for-you-and-I-know-we-can-only-give-presents-on-holidays-and-birthdays-and-fashion-shows-but-it-was-perfect-and-I-wanted-to-give-it-to-you-before-fall-so-you-can-maybe-kind-of-sort-of-wear-it..." he rattled off in one breath, so fast that Jaejoong only caught a few words.

LeeU was holding a box that probably held a scarf or something similar - it was too big for jewelry and too small for a shirt or pants.

Jaejoong was well aware of the fan club rules. Hyun Joong set them up after Jaejoong had mentioned something about the avalanche of presents constantly showing up on his desk. He hadn't meant for it to turn into a rule, but it did. Of course, Jaejoong being Jaejoong, was allowed to accept whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted (and he often did).

He took the box with unbridled enthusiasm.

"Thanks, LeeU."

"You can open it now!" he replied, just as enthusiastically.

"LeeU, you can't-" Myung soo whined shifting closer and pouting. "Hyun Joong-"

Jaejoong turned his smile to the other boy, who went silent instantly. "It'll be our secret." He winked. 

If humans could melt from a simple look, Myung soo would have been a puddle.

Fully aware that it would be very un-cool to tear at the box like a rabid five-year-old on Christmas, he carefully slipped his finger under the seams and tugged. The paper fell away easily, and revealed a plain brown box. He smiled up at LeeU, who beamed back as Jaejoong turned the box over and opened it.

Inside was a simple black scarf decorated with silver-outlined skulls. The fabric was soft and it looked expensive. In fact, it looked like the same scarf he saw one of his favorite models wear during the Paris spring show...

"I saw it and thought of you immediately!" 

Jaejoong fingered the scarf a bit more before closing the box again. "It's wonderful," he made sure to give LeeU an even bigger smile, which the boy returned.

Soccer practice was boring as always. His fan club sat around him like a protective barrier against girls. Not that Jaejoong disliked girls. He was perfectly ok with girls, in fact. But their voices were rather high pitched, and they had a habit of inconspicuously pointing at him as they passed. Still, he grinned and waved back.

Tomorrow he would talk to Changmin...


	2. Chapter 2

Today was going to be the day. Today he would talk to Changmin. He would introduce himself, and Changmin would be completely in awe of his popularity. Then, he would model all of Jaejoong's designs. Forever.

But first-

He took a misstep and tripped halfway down the stairs, landing painfully, once again, on his butt. He moaned. Why did gravity hate him so much?

The noise attracted his mother and two sisters from the kitchen. What followed was the unpleasant result of being the youngest male in a house full of women - they fussed, worried, and checked him over so thoroughly, that by the time he finally managed to fight off his mother, who was trying to force down his pants to see if he was bruised anywhere, he was nearly late for school.

As he sprinted through the gate just before the final bell, he could only feel grateful that his other six sisters weren't home.

He trudged across the courtyard, running his hand through his hair to make sure it wasn't sticking up in strange places. His face was flushed, and he was still breathing irregularly by the time he reached the classroom. After checking his appearance one last time in the window, he peered inside for Changmin.

His heart stopped.

Yoochun was perched on the back of his chair, feet resting on the seat, talking to Changmin, who was similarly seated on his desk table. He was grinning and nodding at something Yoochun said.

Something cracked inside him. Why was Changmin paying attention to Yoochun? Why was he smiling at Yoochun? And why the hell was Yoochun talking to someone else when Jaejoong knew he had been in love with Yunho since their first year?

Panicking, he thought, maybe Changmin liked Yoochun...

Maybe Yoochun decided Yunho was too much trouble (the guy _was_ kind of clueless)...

No. 

Absolutely not.

He shared everything with Yoochun. But not Changmin. Changmin was his.

He strode into the room, side-stepping a rather ominous looking bag as he reminded himself that he did not trip over things at school.

Except, apparently, when he was within reach of Changmin. In the years following, he would continue to insist that the desk in front of Changmin's moved itself just to trip him and send him hurling face-first onto the floor.

Even for him, three times in two days was a bit ridiculous...

The noise made Changmin look around, and down at Jaejoong, who was silently planning a suicide-murder. First, he was going to kill Yoochun, who was now laughing silently behind Changmin, and then he was going to kill himself, because death was better than this. It had to be. If he was dead, he couldn't trip over things. He could just float through them.

"Are you ok?" Changmin stood and offered him a hand up.

He was halfway through mentally propelling Yoochun and himself off the school roof, when the image vanished instantly. He smiled widely and promptly covered it up with his left hand has he reached out to grab Changmin's with his right. His smile was ugly. He couldn't show Changmin his ugly smile before he had the chance to introduce himself.

"Thanks...Changmin, right?" he asked, lowering his hand from his lips, and trying to sound casual while simultaneously planning a pair of leather gloves that would complement Changmin's long fingers perfectly...

Yoochun snorted, and Jaejoong thought that maybe he could still throw him off the school roof without getting caught.

"Yeah...you're..." Changmin tilted his head the same way he had yesterday when Jaejoong tripped into him the first time.

Jaejoong waited, heart beating a little too fast, not really breathing.

"...still holding my hand..."

Jaejoong looked down, then up at Changmin. He grinned and let go, like it didn't take every ounce of willpower to do it.

"Kim Jaejoong, right?"

Jaejoong's stomach did a funny flip, and his heart twirled like the very sound of his name coming from Changmin's lips was the most beautiful sound he would ever hear.

But he had to be modest.

"You know my name?" he gave a little laugh, once again hiding behind his hand.

Changmin raised an eyebrow. "That one guy practically shouted it yesterday."

Yoochun let out a bark-like laugh and nearly toppled over onto the desk behind him. Jaejoong's heart stopped twirling and his stomach dropped.

Oh. 

Right. 

Siwan...

Maybe it was time for a new fan club rule. Like never saying Jaejoong's name in front of cute, tall, new classmates when Jaejoong was trying to subtly and coolly ask them to model for him.

"R-right..." he gave a small smile. "Sorry, my fan club members can get a little over-excited sometimes."

Changmin's eyebrows rose further up his forehead. "Your what?"

"Fan club!" Jaejoong chirped, sounding every bit of proud of himself as he was - who _wouldn't_ want to be as popular as him? Besides, his fan club members were adorable.

"There's Siwan, who you saw yesterday, Seung Hyun, Zelo, Hyun Joong, LeeU, Myung Soo, Jun Hyung, Yamapi, Yuu-chan and-" he stopped when he saw the incredulous look on Changmin's face.

His smile slid away. Did he say something wrong? Changmin was looking at him like he lost his mind.

Before he could ask what was wrong - or sink into the floor, because he felt unexplainably embarrassed - their teacher walked in and called the class to order.

Changmin immediately took his seat, his back to Jaejoong, whose stomach apparently disappeared.

What was wrong with him?

He was halfway through doodling an elaborate C on the corner of the notes he wasn't taking, when a piece of paper fluttered onto his desk.

He paused. For one heart-stopping moment, he thought it was from Changmin.

But no...

For the first time, he was disappointed to see Yoochun's neat handwriting. Sighing, he glanced up to make sure their teacher didn't notice, and read the note.

_You're so obvious it's going to make me physically sick._

Jaejoong frowned. Hastily writing,  _'What?'_ he carefully slipped the paper back on Yoochun's desk.

He heard a soft snort, and moments later the note was back on his desk.

_You've been drooling over him since yesterday, and I've never seen someone write so many C's while taking math notes._

_'I'm not drooling. And shut up, I'm designing a logo.'_

He crumpled the paper and chucked it at Yoochun's head.

Sure, he hadn't stopped thinking about Changmin since he first walked into their classroom. Because he was the model Jaejoong didn't realize he had been waiting for: long legs, nice build, broad shoulders, long fingers...

Okay, maybe he had a small crush.

But it was purely professional. A professional crush. The kind that people get when they find inspiration.

Jaejoong _needed_ Changmin, because if Yunho ruined another outfit, Jaejoong was going to bury him in it.

Another paper landed on his desk. This time from...

His heart skipped a beat.

Changmin.

_Do you two always pass notes so loudly?_

He memorized everything about the cramped scrawl; it wasn't as neat as Yoochun's, but still legible, and Jaejoong loved everything about it.

There was a soft snort next to him. He glanced at Yoochun, who had his hand clamped over his mouth to stifle his laughter. He scribbled something on his notebook and held it up so Jaejoong could see.

_Blushing._

Scowling, he looked away from his so-called best friend, seriously reconsidering his decision not to throw Yoochun off the school roof.

He his reply to Changmin had to be cool. Even though he desperately wanted to apologize for disturbing him, promise to be quiet, and maybe ask Changmin if he would model for him...

Instead he wrote, _'Maybe.'_

He tossed it over Changmin's shoulder, and onto his desk when their teacher turned to write an equation Jaejoong didn't believe was even real - he didn't recognize half the symbols, and since when did math look like jumbled English?

Two notes fell on his desk.

He saw Junsu look at him from his other side, frowning. He always disapproved of Jaejoong and Yoochun's disinterest in school...

Apparently, so did Changmin.

_You plan on passing college exams with a pretty face?_

Jaejoong wasn't sure whether to smile or feel offended. But then he was struck with a brilliant idea...

 _'Tutor me?'_  He tossed the note back, then picked up Yoochun's.

 _I've never seen someone with a non-crush look so happy that their not-crush put a note on their desk_.

Jaejoong tore his note to pieces until they were too shredded to physically tear.

Junsu put a note on his desk.

_I'm not letting you borrow my notes._

Jaejoong pouted at his friend. Junsu always let them borrow his notes. He even did their homework on occasion...

Quickly, he wrote a response, promising to design new jerseys for the soccer team. He heard Junsu sigh, and grinned. He wouldn't have to take math notes for the rest of the year.

Another note from Changmin landed on his desk.

_Pass._

Jaejoong was half joking when he wrote his reply, but he felt oddly disappointed. Why did everyone else in the school love him except Changmin? 

A horrifying thought struck through him. Maybe he wasn't popular at all. Maybe people only pretended to like him because he was pretty...

He hastily scribbled a note and held it over his shoulder for Kim Heechul, who took it. If anyone would tell him the truth, it was him...

There was a soft snort and a murmured, "Egotist," but seconds later Heechul was prodding his back with his pencil and handing Jaejoong his reply.

_Stop being paranoid. Everyone loves you. Though I have no idea why. Why are you even asking?_

_'Changmin hates me.'_

He held the note over his shoulder again. At the same time, their teacher turned away from the chalkboard. Jaejoong tried to make it look like he was stretching but...

"Jaejoong..."

Mr. Baek frowned at the note clutched in Jaejoong's hand, walked over, and plucked it from his hand, which was still stretched high in the air.

"Passing notes?" he asked, returning to the front of the classroom. "This is why you struggle in math, Mr. Kim."

Jaejoong sunk low in his seat as Mr. Baek opened the note. It was one thing to know he was popular - but to have the entire class know he actually cared was horrifying...he might as well just shave his head, gain 100 pounds, and throw out his 27-step skin care kit. What was the use of being pretty when everyone was going to hate him anyway?

His life as the most popular guy in school was over. Because his teacher was a sadist who read notes out loud to the class. Which is how Jaejoong found out in second year that Kwon Yuri had a crush on him...and Jung Sooyeon, and Lee Donghae and-

"Changmin hates me,"their teacher's voice seemed to ring through the silent classroom as if he shouted it.

Jaejoong saw Changmin look over his shoulder and stare at him.

He bit his lip and refused to look back. His face was burning and he was once again envisioning his plunge off the school roof.

"Well, Jaejoong, I'm not sure why you are so worried about your social status, or what you have done to make you think Mr. Shim hates you, but please contain your concerns to outside the classroom."

Jaejoong muttered a soft, "Yes, sir,' and buried his face in his hands for the rest of class. If he threw himself from the roof, Junsu or Yunho would be chasing after his fan club and asking for a name change...

Dying wasn't an option. And probably an overreaction. He just had to talk to Changmin.

He tried when class ended, but Changmin stood up so fast and dragged Kyuhyun (Jaejoong tried not to let it bother him that Changmin already had a friend who wasn't him) out of the class, before Jaejoong could even open his mouth.

"He does hate me," he whined, collapsing back in his chair.

Yoochun chuckled and placed a sympathetic hand on his shoulder. "Who knew someone was immune to your charms."

Junsu grinned. "The world must be ending."

"You guys are the worst friends anyone could hope never to have," Jaejoong muttered.

He flung himself across the desk, and buried his face in his arms with a loud whine as he stomped his feet like a child having a tantrum.

Life was so unfair.


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next couple weeks, Changmin began noticing a lot of things about his new school. Mostly about Kim Jaejoong.

Like the fact that he really did have a fan club. And they were all guys. When he asked Kyuhyun about this, his new friend grinned and said that while half the club was in love with Jaejoong, the other half just idolized him. Either way it was all very strange...

After watching Jaejoong trip over bags, mops, buckets, and absolutely nothing, Changmin couldn't understand why everyone lamented about his inhuman grace. Classmates giggled and called him cute when he butchered English and Korean when reading passages out loud in class. But everyone said he was smart, because he could string together a few Japanese words when he talked to the two exchange students (both of whom were members of his fan club). His "ethereal" beauty was even more of a mystery. Changmin fully admitted Jaejoong's attractiveness, his had nice, broad shoulders, pretty, big eyes, and shiny black hair that Changmin knew must be as soft as it looked. But his skin wasn't porcelain smooth like he heard several girls swoon about yesterday, his lips were slightly chapped because he was constantly chewing or licking them, and...Changmin had difficulty finding flaws in his looks after that...

He was nice. Changmin could see that. He ate lunch with his fan club at least once a week; he accepted and praised people's crappy fashion designs even though according to Kyuhyun he was extremely talented; he even made his own lunches and shared them with anyone who asked for a taste (something that Changmin grudgingly found himself wanting one day when Jaejoong brought in a wonderful looking lunch full of rice and marinated beef).

He wasn't perfect, but Changmin understood why he was popular. 

But one thing continued to bother him...

Why did Jaejoong think he hated him?

For two weeks, Changmin waited for Jaejoong to say something. Who writes a note to their friend saying they think someone hates them and then says nothing after the note is read out loud for the entire class to hear?

Every time Changmin thought about it, he felt wronged. Maybe he could have asked Jaejoong himself. Or maybe he could have explained that he didn't hate Jaejoong, and had no idea where the insane idea even came from.

Was it because of the notes? Changmin thought Jaejoong was joking when he asked to be tutored...he doodled in class! If he wanted a tutor, he would have been taking notes that didn't involve gossip or whatever else he and Yoochun were passing back and forth.

He was so embarrassed after the note was read that he just grabbed Kyuhyun and left without looking at Jaejoong. Kyuhyun laughed the entire time through lunch, and told him not to worry about it. But it had been two weeks and Jaejoong had not said a single word to him.

Not that he cared about what Jaejoong thought. He just...didn't like being misunderstood.

More than once he thought Jaejoong was staring at him, but every time he tried catching the other boy's eye, he was doodling, staring out the window, at the ceiling, or talking to anyone who wasn't Changmin.

Well, if Jaejoong was going to ignore him, why should it be Changmin's problem? He wasn't the one going around making false accusations. 

A hand waved in front of his face.

"You're staring, again."

Changmin snapped his head around to see Kyuhyun grinning at him. Despite only knowing him for a short time, Changmin really liked Kyuhyun; they had a lot of the same interests and similar personalities. Except Kyuhyun was annoyingly observant.

"No I'm not," he lied, glancing in Jaejoong's direction again.

It was a nice, cool fall day, so everyone was having lunch outside in the courtyard. As always, Jaejoong was having lunch with Junsu, Yoochun, and Yunho, surrounded by admirers (many of whom had camera phones out). Something about the sight was extremely annoying. They looked like vultures...

It wasn't like Jaejoong was an idol! He drew clothes and tripped over his own feet. What was so special about that?

"Staring..." Kyuhyun sing-songed.

Changmin scowled and turned so his back was facing Jaejoong.

Kyuhyun sat in front of him on the other side of the table. He was smirking.

"His fan club is recruiting if you want to join."

A look of disgusted horror crossed over Changmin's face. He'd sooner give up meat.

Chuckling, Kyuhyun said, "It's not like you're the only one, you know." He shrugged. "It was only a matter of time. Everyone loves Jaejoong. Even _Heechul_ likes Jaejoong, and the only thing Heechul likes more than himself is his cat...and _Frozen_."

Changmin had no idea what _Frozen_ was, but he didn't care. He had more important things to worry about. Like the fact the when he glanced over his shoulder again, a girl was holding out a notebook and a pen for Jaejoong, which he took with a smile. His friends grinned and rolled their eyes at each other.

He frowned. This was just getting ridiculous.

"...I can't believe he just gave that girl an autograph."

Kyuhyun laughed again. "I think just about everyone whose names aren't Kim Junsu, Park Yoochun, or Jung Yunho has one..."

Changmin slowly turned to look at him. He probably didn't want to hear the answer to this...

"Please don't tell me you have his autograph." 

Unabashed, Kyuhyun grinned. "Of course I do."

Changmin looked incredulously at him, but Kyuhyun just shrugged.

"You haven't seen his designs. He's a little full of himself-" 

Changmin snorted . That was understatement.

"-but he's actually talented. " Kyuhyun's finished. "When he's famous, I'm going to sell it."

Still unimpressed, Changmin raised an eyebrow. "You sure he's going to be famous?"

Kyuhyun shrugged again. "His fall and spring fashion shows during the school festivals are the most popular events after the plays, and he's even been in a local magazine." He waved his hand unconcernedly. "And anyway, I can always sell it to one of the girl's at SunHye Art Institute."

Changmin shook his head.

He didn't care about or want Jaejoong's autograph. He just wanted to know why Jaejoong thought he hated him. 

_I should just ask him,_ he thought, sighing. He didn't think he should have to; it was Jaejoong's misunderstanding. But Changmin didn't want to be misunderstood. Which meant he had to say something. Because Jaejoong clearly wasn't going to.

 

The next morning, he had his chance.

He arrived at school earlier than usual, and waited just inside the main gate. By the second warning bell, Jaejoong still hadn't shown. Changmin was just about to give up and make a second attempt at lunch, when Jaejoong came hurling around the corner, sprinting through the gate, passed Changmin. 

He stopped and hunched over, just as the final bell rang.

"God...damn...sisters..." he panted, clutching his side.

Changmin held back a laugh as he approached. An odd sort of affection washed over him. They were the only ones by the main entrance - the other students were busy rushing to their classrooms, and the teachers were just beginning to head towards them to shut the gate. No one else saw this side of the so-called school idol; the flushed, sweaty, out of breath, totally un-cool but still attractive Jaejoong. It was for Changmin's eyes only, and he felt strangely thrilled about that.

He waited until Jaejoong caught his breath, before he spoke.

"Why do you think I hate you?"

No point in dancing around the issue. It was never Changmin's style anyway. If you wanted to know something, the quickest way was to ask.

Jaejoong froze for a moment. Changmin expected him to turn around, but instead, he let out a soft whine, and started walking away as quickly as he could without breaking into a run.

Stunned, Changmin watched him. Perhaps...Jaejoong hated him? Did he resent Changmin for a misunderstanding that was completely imagined?

He scowled. How petty could someone be?!

Jaejoong wasn't going to get away that easily...

When Changmin caught up to him, he grabbed his wrist and jerked him around. Jaejoong's feet tangled, and he fell forward. Almost automatically (because Changmin had seen this one-too-many times in the last two weeks), he grabbed Jaejoong around the shoulders to steady him before he took a very ungraceful face-dive into the dirt.

Changmin muttered, "How is someone like you so popular?" 

Jaejoong's face tinged pink. He was biting his bottom lip and looking anywhere but Changmin. Which was slightly annoying, and mostly...

 _-not cute,_ Changmin told himself firmly. He was not going to become one of Jaejoong's admirers, following him around and asking for autographs just because he was pretty.

He had to put an end to this.

Because he didn't like misunderstandings...

It definitely didn't have anything to do with the fluttering pulse in his chest and stomach that spread through his entire body as he watched Jaejoong continue to gnaw silently on his lips. 

"I..." he licked his lips, now feeling oddly nervous. The fierce annoyance at being unjustly misunderstood left him the moment Jaejoong tripped into him. "...don't hate you," he finished lamely.

Jaejoong finally looked at him; his lips slightly parted and eyes wide. 

Changmin felt his face heat up in embarrassment.

"I just...the note..." What was wrong with him? Why was he stumbling over his words like some fanboy?

"...I just didn't want you to get the wrong idea...that's all..."

He waited for Jaejoong to say something. Or at least move. He was standing with his mouth still slightly agape, seemingly incapable of speaking. So Changmin did the only thing that made sense: he left. He walked right by Jaejoong, and left him standing alone in the middle of the courtyard. Because he was too embarrassed to do anything else. Did he just create another misunderstanding? But how could "I don't hate you" possibly be misunderstood?

He greeted Kyuhyun as he entered their classroom. It was fine. Everything was fine. He said what he wanted to say. If Jaejoong still didn't like him after that...

"Yoohwan says you broke Jaejoong."

Yoochun grinned at him from his usual spot perched on the back of his chair, with his phone in his hand, and a Cheshire cat grin.

Changmin stopped.

"What?"

Yoochun turned his phone so Changmin could read the screen. "My little brother," he explained. "He's in the fan club..."

After sharing an exasperated look with Yoochun, Changmin turned his attention to the messages.

_Yoohwan-ah <3: What did that new guy say to Jaejoong-hyung? I think he's broken. _

Changmin read Yoochun's _'?'_

_Yoohwan-ah <3: I saw him talking to the new guy, tall, cute, I think he hangs out with Kyuhyun...anyway...he walked away and Jaejoong-hyung just stood there...Yamapi finally got him to move and go to class...._

Changmin rolled his eyes. "I didn't break him." 

Seconds later, the door slammed open and a tall boy from class 3-B Changmin knew to be Jung Yunho, bounded into the classroom with a bright smile.

"Shirota Yuu-chan said Yamapi said the new kid broke Jaejoong?"

He strode over to Changmin and Yoochun, the child-like smile still plastered all over his face, his eyes twinkling in amusement.

Changmin collapsed in his seat. He didn't even see anyone in the courtyard with them! How did it spread so fast? And why was it even news?! 

"I didn't break him," he tried again. "I just told him I didn't hate him."

Yunho blinked, like he just noticed Changmin sitting there. "You're so cute!" Jaejoong forgotten, he bent over and reached for every bit of Changmin he could reach, like an over-excited relative meeting his cute nephew for the first time. Or a puppy meeting a new friend...

Startled, Changmin was just about to throw him off, when Yoochun grabbed the back of Yunho's uniform and hauled him to his feet. He was grinning, but a scary, possessive look bled into his eyes that clearly said, 'Mine.'

"Yunho-ah," Yoochun said sweetly. Changmin shuddered. It was the kind of voice angry wives used right before murdering their husbands. "What did we say about touching people without their permission?"

Definitely a puppy...

"But he's so cute!" Yunho whined, pouting at Yoochun, who seemed to falter a bit at the look.

Shaking free of Yoochun, Yunho smiled at Changmin again. He glanced warily at Yoochun, who was staring at Yunho with an unreadable expression. 

"So you're Changmin, right? The one who rejected him with a note?" Yunho's eyes were full of mirth, like he would burst into laughter at any moment.

Changmin opened his mouth to argue that he hadn't _rejected_ Jaejoong. The tutoring thing was a joke! It had to be! 

Jaejoong walked in, and the words died in his throat. He still looked a little dazed, but somehow he still managed to smile mechanically and greet everyone as he walked to his desk.

"Yunho is beside himself with excitement," Junsu said, speaking for the first time that morning. 

Changmin knew the other had been watching them since he walked in, but he stayed silent as Changmin was harassed by Yunho. Somehow he felt like Junsu thought it was too much work to try and control his friends, so he just let them do what they wanted unless it affected him directly. Apparently Yunho jumping on him like an over-excited puppy was nothing to be concerned about.

Jaejoong glanced at Changmin and looked away again, nodding and mumbling. "That's nice..."

Yoochun and Junsu shared a look, and Yunho grinned. 

Their teacher arrived, saw Yunho, and slammed the attendance book on the podium in annoyance. "Jung get to your own class!"

Still grinning, Yunho winked at Changmin, before leaving, cheerfully unaware of their teacher's glare as the door slid shut behind him with a _bang!_

Why did Yunho wink at him? And why were Junsu and Yoochun glancing at each other with mixtures of exasperation and amusement?

He chanced a glance at Jaejoong as Mr. Baek did roll call. Their eyes locked for a split second, before they both looked away. His face suddenly felt extremely warm.

"Kim Jaejoong?" Baek called.

Silence.

"Kim Jaejoong?" He tried again.

Still no response.

Annoyed and staring directly at Jaejoong, who was absently drawing a single mindless stroke on a blank sheet of paper, he shouted, "KIM JAEJOONG!"

Changmin heard a thunk and a startled "HERE!"

When he glanced back again, he saw Jaejoong glare over his shoulder at Heechul, who just smirked back.

He really should have argued more with his mother when she transferred him...


	4. Chapter 4

"What's wrong with him?"

"I don't know. Yamapi and Yoohwan said he's been like this since morning."

Myungsoo, LeeU, and Youngsaeng were all gathered around the table in the props room behind the theater, staring at Jaejoong, who was too lost in his own thoughts to notice them. He was supposed to be help sort through the massive storage of props and decide if any were salvageable for this year's fall play.

"Did someone say his designs were bad?" Youngsaeng asked, frowning.

LeeU scoffed, "Don't be ridiculous. Who would stay that?"

"Yoohwan said he saw that new guy - Shim Changmin - talking to him."

Myungsoo's eyes widened and he smiled broadly at Youngsaeng. "Ooooh the tall cute one who studies in the library after school all the time?"

Jaejoong looked up when he heard Changmin's name. He felt a somewhat familiar possessiveness come over him - kind of like the day he saw Yoochun talking to Changmin. Why did Myungsoo call Changmin cute? He wasn't cute. Jaejoong didn't do cute on his models. They were hot, sexy, and manly. If he wanted cute he would have asked Junsu to model for him.

"Jaejoong-hyung," Youngsaeng waved a hand in front of his face. "Why are you glaring at Myungsoo?"

Jolting, he blinked, and slowly looked up at Myungsoo, who was looking at him apprehensively.

"Oh, Myungsoo-ah," he smiled, trying to quell the guilt. He didn't mean to scare him. He didn't even know he was glaring. "Sorry, I was just thinking."

But Myungsoo still looked like he had done something wrong. Like a puppy caught tearing up his owner's shoe.

"Are you ok?" LeeU frowned at him, leaning across the table, eyes wide with curiosity and some concern.

"Ok?" Jaejoong was still a little out of it. What were they talking about? Changmin? Him? Or was it the lace and beads spread all over the table in front of him? What were they for again?

"You've been staring at the same piece of lace since you sat down, and then started glaring at Myungsoo." Youngsaeng replied, pulling LeeU back to his chair.

"Oh..." 

Yeah...

He was fine...

He was just thinking about Changmin. And how his entire body felt light and alive every time he remembered that morning. 

_'I don't hate you,'_ echoed over and over in his head throughout the day (often at inappropriate times, like in the middle of English class, or while in the bathroom).

It shouldn't have surprised him. Everyone loved him. But Changmin was different. He felt insecure. He never concerned himself much with whether everyone in school actually liked him. He didn't need his popularity but he would be a fool not to revel in it.

But he needed Changmin.

He barely spoke two words to him, but Jaejoong knew every detail about the way his body moved when he walked. The way he twirled his pen during a particularly boring lesson, or tapped it lightly against the desk as he thought over a problem. Jaejoong memorized the way his lips turned down into a frown, and how his eyes mismatched when he smiled. He even guessed his sizes. Because Jaejoong was a designer before anything else. And all of these details would help him design the perfect finale outfit for the fall fashion show.

"...that Changmin guy really did break him," Youngsaeng waved a hand in front of his face again.

"Should we get Hyun Joong?" LeeU asked, sounding anxious.

"Ask me for what?" Hyun Joong appeared, still in his soccer practice clothes. 

Behind him, three girls stood at the door, giggling behind their notebooks and pointing their cell phone cameras between Hyun Joong and Jaejoong, unsure of who they would rather capture.

"Jaejoong-hyung is broken!" LeeU nearly squeaked.

Hyun Joong moved in front of Jaejoong, grabbed his chin, and moved his head every which way. Jaejoong had no idea what he was looking for, but he knew better than to fight. There were little shrieks behind them and the unmistakable click of phone cameras snapping as many pictures as they could physically hold.

"Looks fine to me," he said, letting go and straightening up again.

The other three were watching on jealously. Another fan club rule: _"With the exception of the fan club President, no contact will be made with Kim Jaejoong unless he initiates the contact."_ Which basically meant "No one but Kim Hyun Joong gets to touch Jaejoong."

It was a rule Jaejoong felt better not asking about.

"I _am_ fine," Jaejoong insisted, batting away Hyung Joong's hands, which had moved to check the rest of him.

He stood.

"Sorry...I'll help you guys out tomorrow, ok? I'm a little distracted today." He flashed them a smile and promised to make every fan club member individual lunches to make up for it.

The promise quickly erased their worries and they all beamed as he left.

He heard Myungsoo's excited, "I have to tell Siwan!" Before the door shut.

"Oppa! Will you make lunch for us too?"

The three girls were still outside.

He fought back a sigh. He didn't mind being popular or admired. He could even tolerate (maybe enjoy on some disgustingly egotistical level) the autographs. But he really...didn't enjoy being followed. Nor did he like having his friends or fan club members followed. But he had an image to keep up, so he smiled.

"Sorry, fan club members only," he gave her his best _'I really want to but can't'_ face, adding a pout and wide apologetic eyes for greater effect.

It worked. Instead, he signed her bag, and took individual pictures with her and her two friends.

After refusing the third round of photos with the excuse of having to be home for dinner, he managed to escape.

He walked by the library and paused at the glass doors. Changmin stayed after school and studied in the library almost every day. Three days a week to be exact. The other two days he left campus and headed towards the college only a few blocks away for his tutoring session.

Not that Jaejoong stalked him.

Today was Wednesday...Changmin went to the library on Wednesdays....

He pushed the doors open and walked in. He didn't really have a plan - he didn't even know if he would be able to speak. Up to this point, he barely managed to say 'hello.'

People stared as he walked by tables, peering at each person as if one of them might magically morph into Changmin. When that proved fruitless, he started looking through the book aisles. He had to be here...it wasn't that late and Jaejoong knew Changmin would be here for at least another hour (he knew this purely through coincidence of course, from reluctantly staying late to watch soccer practice).

He stopped.

Standing in the Biology section, his school jacket gone, white shirt rolled up to his elbows, tie loose, was Changmin. It was like staring at a scene right out of a drama. His bangs fell messily around his face and eyes as he flipped through a heavy-looking book. Jaejoong watched him.

He finally understood what his fan club members and other admirers felt when they saw him. The desire to just stand and stare was overwhelming. But Jaejoong wanted more. 

Heart beating a little harder, he started walking towards Changmin. He stepped very carefully - slowly as to not trip over his own feet. He had fallen in front of Changmin too many times. He had to regain was little of his image he could in front of the boy.

Changmin was so immersed in his reading that he didn't even notice Jaejoong. Stopping just a few feet away, Jaejoong took the opportunity to admire him up close. His lips were turned down in a thoughtful frown and a crease had formed between his eyes, like he was trying to understand something.

Curious, Jaejoong moved closer and ducked down a bit to look at the title of the book.

_Introduction to Molecular Biology._

"What are you studying Molecular Biology for?" he asked before he could stop himself.

Changmin jumped. The book flew out of his hands, and nearly landed on Jaejoong's head.

When Changmin saw him, he sighed, picked up his book, and started walking out the opposite end from where Jaejoong came.

His heart dropped to his stomach, and his stomach through the floor, until he heard Changmin's quiet voice.

"What are you doing here?"

Taking it as an invitation to follow, Jaejoong beamed, and fell in step just behind Changmin as he headed towards a table in a corner that was bathed with sunlight coming from the nearby window.

He felt inexplicably happy - giddy even. Changmin was talking to him! He wasn't ignoring him!

 _'I don't hate you,'_ reverberated through his head again and he felt like he could glide the rest of the way home tonight.

He had to reply coolly. Because if he told Changmin he came here to look for him, he would look like a stalker. And stalkers were definitely not cool.

But he had no idea what to say. What would popular, famous fashion-designer-in-the-making Kim Jaejoong say? Right now, only hopelessly in love Jaejoong was ruling his thoughts.

"I asked you first," he replied, forcing a grin as Changmin made to sit.

The boy paused, half-crouched, before sinking into his seat and raising an eyebrow at Jaejoong.

"What?"

"I asked you why you were studying Molecular Biology. That's not even first year college stuff let alone High School stuff."

Changmin's eyebrow rose higher up his forehead. He crossed his arms.

Far from being deterred, Jaejoong's grin only widened. This...this was something he could do. The push and pull. It was like a game. If he just thought of this like a game, he could win Changmin over and have the only model he would ever need in his life.

"Quid pro quo, Clarice," Jaejoong quoted jokingly.

There was a short silence. Jaejoong watched the corner of Changmin's lips twitch as he fought to control a smile. He finally broke into a beautiful, crooked-eye smile, and laughed.

"Silence of the Lambs."

"Good movie."

"Creepy." Changmin grinned at him. "Kind of like the school idol following me through the bookshelves."

Jaejoong's eyes widened as a blushed crept up his neck and colored his cheeks. Changmin had known he was there?

"I-I wasn't-" he bit his lip and looked away. How embarrassing...what was he going to say now?

Just as he was thinking of finding an excuse to leave and save himself from further humiliation, Yamapi appeared from a nearby row of books. When he spotted Jaejoong, he beamed and hurried over as quickly as the stack of 10 or so books in his arms would allow him.

"Jaejoong-nii!"

For once, one of his fan club members had perfect timing.

Jaejoong smiled brightly. Yamapi (whose real name was Yamashita Tomohisa, but Yamapi was much cuter) had been an exchange student the previous year along with his friend Shirota Yuu. At first, Jaejoong wasn't sure what to do about having two foreign exchange students in his fan club - at the time they were barely conversational in Korean, and Jaejoong's knowledge of Japanese was limited to "hello" "yes" "thank you" and various other phrases learned from material that he hoped his mother never found....

But Yamapi and Yuu were cute, kind, and a little popular themselves. And right now, Jaejoong couldn't have been happier to see him.

The same could not be said for Changmin, who had gone oddly still.

"I thought you were helping Myungsoo with the props for the school play?" Yamapi looked at him curiously, eyes wide and too cute.

Changmin frowned as Jaejoong's smile widened.

"I was...I'll go back tomorrow. Are you still trying out for the lead?"

A faint blush spread across Yamapi's cheeks and he nodded. "Yeah," he mumbled, staring at the ground, frowning a bit. "But Junsu will probably get it."

Jaejoong gave him a sympathetic look. He was probably right. But he still had to be encouraging.

"I'm sure you'll do great," he winked, causing Yamapi to flush a deep shade of red.

Changmin rolled his eyes.

"You think so?" Yamapi's smile was so big that Jaejoong remembered why he never bothered Hyun Joong about keeping the fan club around. It was like having his own litter of kittens or puppies.

"Of course!"

Changmin slammed his books on the table. Jaejoong and Yampi jumped.

"Sorry," he smiled but it didn't quite meet his eyes. "Dropped my books."

Jaejoong stared at him as Yamapi mumbled a goodbye and hurried off.

Once they were alone again, Jaejoong thought Changmin would say something to him. Like maybe why he seemed to have a dark cloud hovering around him since Yamapi showed up. 

But he didn't. He just opened his text book, pulled out his notes, and started writing, ignoring Jaejoong as if he wasn't still standing there staring at him.

"Something wrong?" he tried.

Changmin responded by flipping to another page in his text.

Frowning, Jaejoong tried again, "I thought you said you didn't hate me." 

"Studying."

Jaejoong dropped into the chair across from him, still frowning. Something was off. Changmin had been perfectly friendly just moments ago.

The movement made Changmin look up. "Going to watch me study, Hannibal Lector?"

Jaejoong smirked and leaned forward. He was slowly beginning to understand Changmin. He wouldn't be impressed with a wink and a smile. No. Jaejoong had to be smart. Witty.

That was fine.

Jaejoong could be witty.

"I heard smart brains taste pretty good."

Ok...

Not so witty. But if they were sticking with the _Silence of the Lambs_ theme...

Changmin raised an eyebrow at him.

Laughing a little at his own lameness, he leaned back again and pulled his sketchbook from his bag. So long as he had his muse sitting directly in front of him, he was going to get some designs finished. He wanted to start piecing together outfits this weekend for the school festival. It was only two months away and even if he wasn't able to make everything from scratch, it still took a while to make and modify everything.

"I'm going to sketch."

He put his pencil to paper and went to work, still aware of Changmin staring at him, and making every effort to ignore it.

Yes. This was the way to get to Changmin. Some people required a little bait on a hook. Changmin needed a net.

Either way...

Once Jaejoong finally found the courage to ask Changmin to be his model, it would be impossible for him to refuse.


	5. Chapter 5

Changmin was distracted. For an entire week he had been distracted.

Every day he didn't have tutoring session, Jaejoong was sitting at their - _his-_ table in the corner of the library, flashing Changmin a stupid grin before going back whatever he was doodling in his stupid sketchbook.

Changmin could sit at another table.

He _could_.

But it was his table. He was there first. And it wasn't like Jaejoong talked to him. Actually, aside from the occasional giggling girl or passing fan club member (usually Seung Hyun or Yamapi), Changmin was allowed to study in peace.

Except he could hear Jaejoong's pencil scratching across his paper. Sometimes in short, quick strokes; other times they were long and sweeping. Or he would hear rapid movements that meant Jaejoong was shading something. Changmin didn't want to - it was completely involuntary - but he memorized every sound and movement of Jaejoong's pencil as it moved across the paper.

Every once and a while, he would even sneak a glance at the drawing, making sure to not let his gaze linger long enough to be suspicious or bring attention to the fact that he was a little interested in what Jaejoong might be creating. Not like he seemed to noticed - Jaejoong was always in his own world once the pencil touched a blank sheet of paper.

Today started off just like that: a muttered hello after a half-hearted glare to show Jaejoong he was still an intruder at Changmin's otherwise perfectly secluded table. The fact that he was already becoming used to (even enjoying) Jaejoong's presence was going to go with Changmin to the grave.

He pulled out his notebook and textbook, and began his usual ritual of studying as Jaejoong doodled.

After jotting down a few notes, he felt a pair of eyes on him. Looking up, he saw Jaejoong with his head tilted to one side, chin resting on the back of his hand, and pencil held loosely between his fingers. He was staring at Changmin with a thoughtful expression.

Changmin raised an eyebrow. "What?"

This wasn't part of their usual routine...

Jaejoong shrugged. "Nothing."

"You're staring at me."

"I'm thinking."

He knew he could just go back to his work. Ignore whatever it was the Jaejoong was thinking, and maybe even change tables, because that's what he should have done a week ago. But he couldn't look away. Jaejoong's curious expression was much more interesting than the chemical make-up some organic material Changmin couldn't even pronounce.

Unable to stop himself, he asked, "About?"

"You."

Changmin blinked. His face heated and suddenly picking a table that constantly had sun shining on it seemed like a stupid idea - it was much too hot.

"W-what?"

He watched the pencil move up and down like a see-saw between Jaejoong's fingers, feeling oddly flustered. Why was Jaejoong thinking about him? Why did that make his skin feel like it was made up of electrical wires? Jolting his pulse every time he thought about it?

"Do you really want to be a doctor?"

"H-how?"

Jaejoong smiled. "I might not pay attention in class, but I pay attention to you, and you do nothing but read Biology and Chemistry books..." he inclined his head towards his book, "Plus that one is called 'Introduction to Pre-Medicinal Science.'"

Changmin blinked. Jaejoong paid attention to him?

A lump caught in his throat and he swallowed. "Y-yeah...I'm studying to be a surgeon."

For some reason, he felt like he just shared something extremely personal. It wasn't like people never asked about his plans after High School. He told countless people that he was going to school to be a surgeon.

There was a flicker of disappointment in Jaejoong's eyes. That was odd...why would Jaejoong be disappointed? Everyone always told him how great it was and that the career suited him. Even his mother had been saying it since he was a child.

He even thought he heard Jaejoong mutter, "what a waste," under his breath, but seconds later, he said, "That's cool. What made you want to be a surgeon?"

His expression was open, eyes wide and curious. Changmin hated it. It made him feel vulnerable. It was a perfectly normal question...people always asked why you wanted to be something.

So why didn't he have an answer?

When he thought about it...no one ever asked. They just accepted it. Changmin was smart. Smart people became doctors and lawyers. That was the assumption everyone around him seemed to make.

"I don't know," he answered truthfully. "I just am..."

Jaejoong raised an eyebrow. "You just are?"

Changmin nodded. He really didn't like this conversation. It was too personal. He never even asked himself these questions. And why did Jaejoong care anyway?

"You must want to since you study so much," he continued.

Changmin glanced down at his scribbled notes. Did he? He didn't really feel a desire to be a doctor. It was just one of those things...like going to school. He just did it. Kids went to school; adults worked; parents cared for children; Changmin studied to be a doctor. There was no "why." It just...was.

"I don't have any real feeling towards it," he found himself saying, when he really wanted to tell Jaejoong to shut up and let him study. Which would now be impossible, because his mind was full of overflowing thoughts.

When _did_ he decide to start studying for pre-med? Last year? The year before? His mother always praised his good grades and aptitude for math and science. She told him more than once that he would make a good doctor. She always told stories about how he took care of his little sister's bumps and bruises, and even scolded their father about not properly taking care of his pregnant wife by staying out all night drinking.

But that was expected, wasn't it? He was the oldest son. He was supposed to take care of his little sister. And his father _was_ supposed to take care of his mother when she was pregnant. Wasn't it a given?

"I guess my mother..." he muttered, surprised at its truth, and even more that he was sharing it with Jaejoong. "I mean...she just...gave me the idea..." he added.

Yes, his mother planted the idea in his head; and as the years went by, it just made sense. What else _could_ he do? Nothing really interested him much, except _Star Wars_ and Legos, but he couldn't exactly make a career out of those.

Jaejoong was staring blankly at him with a slight frown, and Changmin felt indignant. It was like he was being judged. Who was Jaejoong to frown at him like that? It wasn't like it was any of his business what Changmin did with his life...

"How do you decide to do something for the rest of your life if you don't even enjoy it?"

"I believe it's called growing up," he replied through gritted teeth. He wanted to be done with this conversation.

Jaejoong snorted. "Which is why half the adult world is miserable."

"If we all got to do what we wanted, we would be a world of celebrities, firefighters, and teachers."

"You're pretty cynical for a 16-year-old."

"17."

Jaejoong rolled his eyes. "So at 17, you've decided to your life, have you?"

Changmin had no idea why he was even talking about this. And to Jaejoong of all people. He didn't even talk about his future like this with his own _parents_!

So, why were the words coming out of his mouth so easily? Why did he feel like a huge pressure was being lifted from his shoulders? Like he had been harboring some big secret.

He pushed the feeling away. No. Jaejoong had no reason or right to ask these questions. They weren't even really friends! They just spent silent hours in the library together.

"Haven't you decided to become famous designer or something?" he shot back. "Why are you allowed to decide on your future and not me?"

Undeterred, Jaejoong nodded. "Of course, I have. But it's my passion. I'm going to study fashion design and apprentice under anyone who will take me, get a job anywhere I can in the fashion industry, even if it means mopping toilets in a textile shop, and eventually have my own label."

By the time he finished, he was smiling, a somewhat faraway look in his eyes, like he was already imagining a future where he was bossing an army of poor interns and assistants around his workshop.

In that moment, Changmin really believed Jaejoong's dream would come true. Part of him was jealous. He never had a dream. There was nothing he wanted so badly that he would be willing to mop floors for it.

Of course, he couldn't tell Jaejoong all of that - it was too embarrassing. So instead, he smirked. "Well, with your grades you probably have a shot at the toilets."

Jaejoong stuck his tongue out in response, and the air around them seemed to lighten. He felt much more comfortable now. Like an invisible barrier between them crumbled.

They spent the next half hour in their usual silence - Jaejoong doodling, and Changmin deciphering chemical compounds that looked completely imagined by whoever wrote the textbook.

The words and diagrams were starting to blend together and blur. Changmin had no idea what he was looking at anymore. Just as he was about to give up and go home, Jaejoong dropped his sketchbook on his notes.

Changmin raised an eyebrow at him. Jaejoong was grinning nervously.

"Tell me what you think."

Changmin frowned. He didn't know the first thing about fashion. When he told Jaejoong this, the other boy shrugged.

"I'm not asking for a magazine review. A simple 'I like it' will suffice."

"What makes you so sure I'll like it?" he teased, grinning a bit.

"Because I'm a genius and everyone likes my designs," he replied, making Changmin laugh.

"Just like how everyone likes you?"

"Just like that."

Shaking his head and still grinning, he admitted that Jaejoong wasn't wrong - everyone _did_ like him. Even Changmin.

It turned out he was also right about the designs - they were impressive. Not that Changmin was in any position to judge; his wardrobe consisted of t-shirts, hoodies, jeans, and worn-out sneakers.

The model on the page was wearing tattered jeans Jaejoong shaded in dark and noted "Black or light gray"  next to them; there also seemed to be thin chains made to look like part of the loose threads around the tears. There was a simple belt and the white v-neck t-shirt had an outline of a skull taking up the entire left side of the model's torso. Changmin saw that Jaejoong scrawled "silver outline for skull" next to the model.

It wasn't his usual style, but he loved it. It was simple, but stylish, and he almost wanted to know how it would look on _him_. The model Jaejoong drew seemed to have long legs and a similar torso as him, like Jaejoong had made it with him in mind...

He blushed and cursed himself at the same time. How arrogant was he to think Jaejoong would actually use him as a model?

After mentally shaking himself, he looked up at Jaejoong with a small, encouraging smile. "I like it."

Jaejoong beamed and practically flung himself across the table to flip to the next page.

"This is the jacket I want to go with it," he said excitedly. "I can't make a leather jacket like this right now, but one day..." he trailed off with the same wistful smile he had earlier.

Changmin stared at him. His pulse was doing funny things. Unfamiliar, fluttering things.

Jaejoong remained oblivious as he moved around to the corner of the table next to Changmin, now practically leaning over his shoulder.

"These are the accessories," he said. "I've already got the necklace made."

Somewhere between explaining the design and their shoulders brushing against each other every time Jaejoong moved his arm, Changmin stopped listening. His arm was burning. His heart seemed to lodge itself in his throat, and if Jaejoong decided to ask him anything, he probably would forget how to speak Korean.

He wasn't looking at the sketches anymore. He was watching Jaejoong. His eyes were bright with the kind of excitement only people in love have. Jaejoong was in love with his designs. With fashion. He watched as Jaejoong said something about the school festival. The smile never left his lips.

Something stirred inside him. That same sense of affection he felt when Jaejoong came sprinting through the gates. He saw Jaejoong smile at lot. He knew the difference between his polite, school-idol smile, the genuine smile he showed to his friends, and the one of adoration he reserved for his fan club. But like his clumsiness, this smile was for Changmin's eyes only. The one with a child-like enthusiasm for something he loved.

Another pang of jealously struck through him. He would never look at his Biology textbooks or think about medicine with the same look Jaejoong gave his designs...

"Do I have something on my face?"

He startled out of his thoughts. His eyes widening and his cheeks reddening when he realized how close Jaejoong's face was.

Jaejoong had turned away from his sketches and was leaning close with a look of concern.

Changmin nearly toppled out of his chair in his haste to stand up. Too close. They were definitely too close. Didn't Jaejoong know anything about personal space? His heart was beating too hard and his head was spinning. He couldn't even think straight enough to be angry.

"Changmin-?"

"-I gotta go," he muttered, gathering his things as quickly as he could.

Still looking confused as worried, Jaejoong watched as he shoved his books in his bag and rushed off with a hurried, "See you tomorrow!"

He was worried that Jaejoong might follow. When he didn't, Changmin let out a sigh of relief.

Entering the hallway was like walking into an air conditioned house on a hot day. His head cleared and he could breathe easier. With the sun coming through the window and Jaejoong's arms pressed against his, the library was too warm. Too stifling. He couldn't think straight with it that hot.

Worst of all, his head was a total mess with Jaejoong so close.

He groaned as he walked home.

He should change tables.

But the very next day, he knew he would be in the same spot. Jaejoong sketching, and his mind wandering away from his work to the gentle scratching of pencil across paper.


	6. Chapter 6

Jaejoong expected lunch to be awkward.

Meeting in the library and chatting in the morning was becoming normal. Changmin even _smiled_ when Jaejoong walked down the aisle to his desk.

But when Yunho bounded into their classroom moments after the lunch bell rang, and announced that Changmin would be eating lunch with them that day, Jaejoong had his doubts.

No one - not even his fan club members - ate at their table during lunch. It was like an unspoken rule. Wherever Jaejoong and their friends happened to be eating, they were surrounded by admirers, but no one actually sat with them. They just hung around the parameter with their cell phone cameras and shy requests for autographs.

Changmin had started out a little unsure, and threw furtive glances over at his usual table with Kyuhyun, who was sitting with Choi Minho, a second year that played on the soccer team and was now apparently Changmin's friend. Jaejoong didn't know when or how it happened, and he preferred not to think about it.

But now, Changmin was sitting across from him, next to Yunho, smiling a bit as they chatted with Junsu about some baseball game Jaejoong never saw. Yoochun was watching them with mild interest, even though Jaejoong knew he cared as much about baseball as Jaejoong did.

Jaejoong wasn't quite sure how to feel about the ease in which Changmin seemed to have settled in with his friends. It felt like he was sitting in on something exclusive at first. Private. Like he was inviting Changmin into his home for the first time. But it felt natural. Right. And he was strangely happy.

His friends gazes finally shifted over to him as he opened a container filled with kimbap. 

Before he even reached for his chopsticks, Yoochun immediately reached over the table and snagged two pieces as Yunho let out a small cheer and took three. Junsu also helped himself to a piece. This was why he always made twice as much as he needed - his friends were all shameless food thieves.

Changmin was the only one who refrained (though he was gazing at the container will a look of poorly controlled yearning). Jaejoong watched, amused, as Changmin's eyes followed the progress of Yunho's hand as he ate.

Yunho must have felt his gaze, because he paused in mid-motion of devouring his second piece, and smiled at Changmin. 

"Want to try a piece? Jaejoong's cooking is the best!" He held out the piece of kimbap, as if to feed it to him.

Jaejoong watched as Changmin smiled uncertainly. He had the sudden urge to leap over the table and knock the food from Yunho's hands.

Luckily, Yoochun grabbed Yunho's hand, redirected it towards his mouth, and ate the kimbap himself. He smiled contently as he chewed, and winked at Jaejoong. This was why they were best friends, Jaejoong thought.

"Amazing as always," he said, licking his lips.

"YAH!" Yunho pouted. "That was for Changmin!"

Unrepentant, Yoochun just grinned, shrugged, and picked up another piece of kimbap. He held it out for Yunho, with a cute expression. When the other boy looked at him reproachfully, Yoochun's smile widened, and he stuffed the piece in Yunho's mouth, ignoring the muffled protests.

Jaejoong reminded himself to make Yoochun something special for lunch before the end of the week. He picked up a piece of kimbap and held it out for Changmin, who raised an eyebrow at him.

"I promise it's good," he said, grinning.

After a split-second hesitation, Changmin carefully leaned forward and let Jaejoong feed him. He chewed slowly and deliberately, as if seriously assessing its quality. Jaejoong watched him expectantly. Once again, he was feeling insecurities that were completely unfamiliar to him. What if Changmin didn't like it? What if the rice was overcooked? Or the cucumber wasn't crisp enough? What if-?

"It's good."

His confidence came roaring back, and he had to fight back the urge to shove the entire container at Changmin for him to eat.

"Of course it is," he replied coolly (he _did_ have about a dozen people watching him right now, and he had an image to maintain). "I'm good at everything."

Changmin snorted and took a second piece out of the container without hesitation. He ate it with unmasked delight. 

Jaejoong wanted to make him lunch for the rest of the year. Maybe longer.

"Arrogant. It's not _that_ good."

The look on his face and third helping, said otherwise.

Jaejoong smirked. "Jealous."

"You trip over your own feet and you're failing math, what is there to be jealous of?"

There was a short pause in which his friends all laughed, and a few girls around him murmured disagreements. One even said Jaejoong was more graceful than a cat.

"I'm prettier," he shot back.

"I'm taller."

"I'm popular."

"I'm smarter."

"I'm older."

Changmin smirked. "I'm _younger_."

"YAH!" Jaejoong kicked him under the table as his friends roared with laughter. Around them, a few of their classmates were filming the entire scene, some with grins of their own, others looking at Changmin with mild offense. How _dare_ he talk to Jaejoong with such disrespect!

"Are you calling me old?"

Changmin winced at the pain in his shin and attempted to kick him back, but he avoided it.

"You're the one bragging about being a grandpa."

He reached for another piece of kimbap, but Jaejoong snatched the container away and held it out of reach.

"I'm only a year older than you!" He glared playfully, a small smile threatening the corner of his lips. Of course, he wasn't actually offended. This was just a part of the game they always ended up playing.

Changmin's eyes stayed fixed on the container of kimbap, which Junsu was now pilfering another piece from. 

"Ok fine. You're not old. Let me have another piece." He looked at Jaejoong with pleading eyes, his hands clasped together, with one finger held up.

His pulse jumped in his throat, and he almost slid the container back to Changmin. Almost. In fact, Changmin probably could have asked for anything and Jaejoong would have wanted to give it to him. Even if it was all of South Korea.

He pushed back the feeling and smirked. He wouldn't lose to Changmin this easily. Not in front of their classmates.

"Call me hyung-nim."

Changmin's eyes widened.

"I'll give you _all_ of it, if you do," he added.

He watched in amusement as an array of conflicted emotions passed over Changmin's face. He could practically hear the dilemma going on in the boys head: he wanted the kimbap, but he had his pride. But Changmin loved food. He was also stubborn.

"I don't need it," he deadpanned, and turned his attention to his original lunch of marinated beef and rice.

Stunned, he stared at Changmin as he took a large bite of his lunch and smirked at him. His friends were still laughing. Between giggles, Junsu asked if Changmin could eat with them every day.

Jaejoong ignored all of them.

"Give me some of yours, then, and you can have another piece."

Changmin's smirk deepened. "Call me hyung."

Jaejoong froze. He could see the challenge in Changmin's eyes. He didn't think Jaejoong would do it.

Jaejoong didn't think so either, at first. But it was all part of the game. And he had a plan.

"Hyu-u-u-ng," he whined and jutted his lower lip out into the cutest pout he could muster.

He fought back a triumphant smile as Changmin's chopsticks clattered to the table. Jaejoong didn't know which was more amusing - his red face or dinner plate wide eyes.

Changmin looked away quickly and slid his lunch across the table. "Here. Just take it," he muttered.

Jaejoong smiled and piled four more pieces of kimbap onto the beef and rice. He slid it back to Changmin, who gazed at him, confused.

He shrugged, and popped a piece of kimbap in his mouth.

He never wanted Changmin's lunch anyway - he didn't really know what he wanted. But when he saw Changmin flustered, his brain had stopped working, and he was piling food into Changmin's already full container. It was a small miracle he left any for himself (a whole five pieces, after his friends stole a few more).

They ate in a somewhat awkward silence, with Yunho and Junsu once again talking about sports (soccer this time), and Yoochun napping face down with his head resting on his arms, headphones drowning out any conversation.

Every once and a while, Jaejoong would glance up and see Changmin eating with constrained enthusiasm. The look of pure bliss as he ate was something he couldn't hide, and Jaejoong had a sneaking feeling he was trying hard not to devour the entire thing in a single bite.

Watching him gave Jaejoong more ideas for an outfit. After finishing off his last piece of kimbap, he pulled out his sketchbook and opened up to a blank page.

Halfway through finishing the basic outline of the model (which once again looked suspiciously like Changmin), Yunho drew their attention to another table at the end of the courtyard.

It was surrounded by girls, so all Jaejoong could see was a tuft of messy black hair belonging to whoever they were crowded around.

"Is that the new second year?" Junsu asked, turning around to look. 

Yoochun continued to doze. Changmin glanced up, and went back to his lunch, uninterested.

Shrugging, Jaejoong turned back around. "No idea. Didn't know we had a new student."

"I heard he was Japanese," Yunho said. "Maybe Yamapi and Yuu-chan know him?"

Jaejoong shrugged again, not really interested. "Maybe."

When lunch ended, he glanced back over at the table where the new kid was sitting; he was already gone, but a gaggle of girls tittered as they passed, not even paying Jaejoong a second glance, which was unusual.

He heard one of them say, "Matsushita Yuya" "school idol" and "competition," before erupting into giggles again.

Next to him, Changmin snorted and muttered "Not even close..."


	7. Chapter 7

"Is that Changmin?"

Yunho leaned over from where he crouched next to Junsu's desk, and gazed curiously at Jaejoong's latest sketch.

Jaejoong hastily covered the drawing with his arms. His cheeks flushed.

Changmin looked over at the sound of his name, but Jaejoong avoided his eyes.

"W-what?" he smiled nervously, speaking over the pounding in his ears. He wished Yunho and his curiosity would leave him and his embarrassing obsession with Changmin alone.

But he didn't. Because fate, or God, or something with greater power than Jaejoong, hated him.

Yunho frowned and tilted his head. "I asked if that was Changmin." He pointed at the sketchbook.

Jaejoong was horribly aware of Changmin's stare, but he glanced quickly at Yunho instead, before looking away again. Fixating on an invisible spot on his desk, he muttered, "I have no idea- HEY!"

Yoochun had yanked his sketchbook from under his arms. After seeing the design, he let out a bark-like laugh. "It is!"

Jaejoong's face was bright red now, and the room was suddenly too hot. Panic rose in his chest when he noticed Changmin eyeing the book. He tried to snatch it from Yoochun's hands, but his so-called friend held it out of reach, still grinning mischievously at him. Jaejoong scowled. Once he got his sketchbook back, he was going to beat Yoochun with it.

His eyes widened as saw Changmin slowly reach for the book. Before he could fling himself across his desk to prevent what he knew was going to be an embarrassing disaster, Changmin managed to steal the sketchbook right out of Yoochun's hands.

He nearly toppled over his desk trying to get to him. Changmin couldn't see the sketches. Absolutely not. He couldn't know that Jaejoong had been drawing him for the past month...

The thought was mortifying. Changmin was going to think he was some weird stalker and never talk to him again. He-

Yunho leapt over his desk and hurried over to look at the designs.

Jaejoong watched in horror as Yunho blocked the only route to his sketchbook, and crouched down in front of Changmin as he flipped through the pages. His eyes became wider with each turn. Every model looked like him.

Jaejoong had bought an entire sketchbook just for those designs. There was nothing but Changmin in that book. It felt like they were flipping through his diary...

Junsu put a sympathetic hand on his shoulder as he buried his head in his arms, and waited for the inevitable outburst. His held his breath every time he heard a page turn. It echoed loudly in his ears, drowning out Yunho's soft sounds of awe and comments of praise.

The sound finally stopped. Changmin's voice cut through the drone of his classmates.  

"Why..." there was a short pause. "They all look like me..."

Jaejoong let out the breath he had been holding. Changmin didn't sound disgusted, or angry. He didn't throw the sketchbook at Jaejoong and demand an explanation. He only sounded surprised. Jaejoong could handle that.

Still...he felt like he had been caught doing something he shouldn't. It was the kind of horror you felt when a tightly held secret finally became known to the one person you were trying to keep it from.

Slowly, reluctantly, he looked up and over to Changmin.

Yunho was still squatting by the desk, now flipping through the pages himself with an excited smile. Jaejoong fought back a smile of his own and the rush of affection he had for his friend. Yunho always loved his designs.

When he turned his gaze to Changmin, their eyes met. His pulse jumped-it nearly exploded out of his chest-but it was fleeting, and gone the moment Changmin looked away. His cheeks were pink, and he looked confused. Even a little uneasy. But not angry.

Relief finally started weaving its way into his muscles, and he relaxed a little more.

Now, he just had to figure out what to say. Unfortunately, his mouth felt like it was full of cotton. He was intensely aware of Junsu and Yoochun's stares, but couldn't even bring himself to look at them. He knew Junsu was gazing at him worriedly (like any good friend would), but Yoochun was grinning as if the entire situation was for his personal amusement.

"Ah!" Yunho's cheerful voice cut through their awkward silence. He smiled brightly between them, looking from one to the other. "You're going to ask him to model for you in the fall fashion show, right? That's why they all look like him!"

Jaejoong could have kissed Yunho for his simple, but reasonable reasoning. Of course! Jaejoong always sketched his models with the outfits he intended them to wear. He had entire sketchbooks full of models that looked like Yunho, Yoochun, Junsu, and even the girl, Im Jin Ah, who modeled for him every year. It was just a habit...the fact that Yunho was completely wrong didn't matter. Changmin didn't need to know the real reason the sketchbook was full of models that looked like him...

"Yeah..." he smiled, mostly out of relief. Thank god for Yunho...

He looked at Changmin. A lump suddenly formed in his throat as their eyes met again. He could feel his pulse speeding up in panic. What in Changmin refused? What if he laughed at him? Or thought it was a joke?

Right now, all Jaejoong could see was shock.

Licking his lips, he took a deep breath. It was now or never...he had to ask. Yunho had more-or-less kicked down the door for him.

"I...uh...was..." he looked away and stared at an invisible spot on Changmin's chin, because that was less nerve-racking than staring at his eyes. "I mean...yeah...I was hoping you would..." he mumbled the last few words, sure that Changmin wouldn't catch them.

A long silence passed between them. Jaejoong was sure that meant rejection.

Before Changmin could say anything, their teacher walked in, kicked Yunho out, and began roll call.

Changmin carefully and silently placed the sketchbook back on his desk, avoiding his eyes the entire time. He turned around to face the front of the class, and didn't look back again for the rest of the morning.

Something heavy and unpleasant settled in his stomach. The feeling intensified when Changmin hurried towards Kyuhyun as the lunch bell rang, without so much as a glance in Jaejoong's direction.

Lunch was miserable. After last time, Changmin had dragged Kyuhyun and Minho over to eat with them every day. Jaejoong was becoming used to the crowded table. Kyuhyun and Changmin would get into arguments with Yunho over what the best anime was, while Minho and Junsu would talk about soccer. Jaejoong enjoyed the liveliness. But today...with just the four of them...the table felt empty. There even seemed to be a grey cloud hovering over it.

When he glanced over at Changmin's table, the dull ache in his chest turned into a sharp stab. Changmin had his back to Jaejoong's table as he talked to Kyuhyun and Minho.

Junsu, Yoochun, and Yunho tried offering words of encouragement, but he didn't hear any of it.

When they returned to class, Jaejoong settled in for an afternoon as miserable as the morning.

 

After school, he was in the costume shop, fitting Junsu's Dracula outfit for the fall musical. As Yamapi predicted, Junsu had snagged the lead role.

"I don't know why you don't just ask-OW! HEY!"

Jaejoong had stuck a pin in Junsu's thigh. He didn't apologize as he pinned it through the fabric and moved down Junsu's leg to tighten the pants a bit more so they clung to his legs. Maybe it was a bit too sexy for a High School play, but the theater instructor told Jaejoong he could do whatever he wanted. Jaejoong wanted to turn Junsu's "angelic" image into something dangerous and sexy. So that was what he was doing. Because who ever heard of an angelic vampire?

Junsu rubbed the sore spot and glared at him as he pinned the hems.

"It's not like you're asking him on a date or any-OW! STOP!"

Jaejoong stuck his ankle this time, and dodged his foot as Junsu tried to kick him.

"You're being over dramatic."

He moved his foot before Jaejoong could spear it. "I'm not a pin cushion!"

Jaejoong glared up at him, and pricked his foot in response, earning another yelp and a kick.

There were times Jaejoong appreciated Junsu's unwavering honesty. Today was not one of those times. His friend was too busy chasing around soccer balls and girls to understand the nagging twinge in Jaejoong's chest every time he saw Changmin. It wasn't just about the modeling anymore...

Changmin made him feel insecure about everything he always felt so sure about-his popularity, his designs, himself in general. His head spun and his thoughts went in twenty different directions every time they saw each other. Just sitting in the library was enough to make his pulse beat as if he was running a marathon...

He broke away from his thoughts as the door to the costume shop creaked open.

A cute boy with stylishly messy black hair popped his head into the room with an expression that clearly said, "I'm lost."

Jaejoong stared at him. Why did he look familiar...? His eyes fixed on the mop of hair, and he had the image of the same black mass peaking through a hoard of girls in the courtyard.

_'Ah....'_

It was the new kid...

" _Sumimasen..._." he smiled shyly, speaking in Japanese before switching quickly to clumsy Korean. "I'm...uh...l-lost..lost? Uh... _doko_...I mean...where is the...uh...dance studio?"

He stared at them apprehensively, as if he was sure he had said the wrong thing. Jaejoong held back a grin. How cute...

Junsu gave directions, but the boy only blinked. Apparently his Korean still needed work.

Jaejoong's Japanese wasn't very good, but he learned a fair amount from Yamapi and Yuu. He could at least take them to the studio; it wasn't very far from the costume room anyway.

Smiling, he stood and said, "I'll show you."

The boy beamed and bowed. " _Arigatou gouzaimasu!_ I mean...thank you!"

"I'll just stand here with pins in my legs, then, shall I?" Junsu muttered grumpily as Jaejoong led the boy out of the room.

"Thanks Junsu-ah! I'll be back soon!" Jaejoong called over his shoulder.

Just before the door shut, Junsu yelled, "YAH!"

The Japanese boy giggled behind his hand, and Jaejoong couldn't help but smile back. He really was very cute...no wonder why he already had girls following him around.

" _Matsushita Yuya desu ne?_ Matsushita Yuya, right?" he asked.

Yuya's eyes widened and his cheeks tinged pink. " _Hai!_ Yes! How did you know?"

Jaejoong grinned as they walked down the hall. "I heard girls talking earlier..."

Yuya tilted his head in confusion, not quite understanding. Jaejoong repeated in clumsy Japanese that he heard girls talking at lunch. He did a poor job of it, but the other boy seemed to understand and nodded, still smiling.

"You're Kim Jaejoong, right?" he asked enthusiastically.

Jaejoong couldn't help but feel pleased that he already knew him. "Yeah."

"You're really...uh... _yuumei-jin...._ " he ended lamely, and looked at Jaejoong, distraught over his poor Korean.

Jaejoong could only smile, and told him the Korean word for "famous person" before quickly telling him he wasn't.

"Yamapi and Yuu-chan said you were uh...fashion...fashion design!"

Jaejoong laughed and nodded. "Yes I do fashion design."

"Waahh..." Yuya looked at him in awe as they stopped outside the dance studio. "I love fashion, too!"

Jaejoong beamed. " _Hontouni?_ Really? _"_ He asked excitedly. _"Ashita..._ uuh...tomorrow, I'll show you!"

The happiness that only came from being able to show off his designs filled him. A new person to show his designs to! What could be more exciting than that?

"Really?" Yuya looked at him, just as excited as Jaejoong. "I would love to!"

With the promise of meeting tomorrow during lunch to look at his sketches, Jaejoong left Yuya in front of the dance studio, oblivious to the other boys please smile and slightly pink face.


	8. Chapter 8

Changmin sighed. His forehead rest on his physics textbook. The words stopped making sense an hour ago, and he had been in the same position for about twenty minutes. The only things his mind seemed capable of processing for the past two days were things related to Jaejoong: fashion, modeling, blank sheets of paper, pencils, and kimbap. Lots and lots of Kimbap. His mother thought he missed lunch after he ate nearly the entire batch he had insisted she make for dinner last night.

He thought about the reasons why he stared a little too long at Jaejoong when they sat across from each other in the library. He thought about how Jaejoong nearly tripped into at least three desks on the way to his own that morning. Thought about why his heart raced and the room felt too warm whenever Jaejoong's eyes caught his. Or when Jaejoong was close at all, really. But mostly, he thought about the sketches. Why was Jaejoong drawing him? Yoochun had explained yesterday that Jaejoong always drew his models wearing his designs, because he wanted to be sure they suited every model perfectly. But Changmin wasn't his model. And he couldn't fathom any reason _why_ Jaejoong would want him. Much less fill at least 12 pages worth of designs in an otherwise empty sketchbook.

He groaned into his book. Of all people to make him feel this confused, it was Kim Jaejoong: the school idol who even had his own fan club.

Someone thumped into the seat across from him. He froze. For a split, heart-stopping second, he thought it might be Jaejoong. But he was was supposed to be in the costume room again today...

He glanced up in anticipation, only to have a wave of disappointment crash into him.

Yoochun...

He was grinning in a way that made Changmin want to hit him. "Hoping I was someone else?" he drawled.

His grin widened when Changmin's cheeks turned red.

Scowling, he looked away. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh?" Yoochun tilted his head and gazed innocently at Changmin, who desperately wished the librarian would turn the damn heat down. It was the end of September, not January! "So you _weren't_ hoping I was Jaejoong?"

"No," he lied.

He stood and gathered his books. Getting any work done today was already proving impossible. Yoochun was only making it worse. Maybe he could clear his head on the walk home, and study in his room, where Jaejoong's presence wasn't imprinted on his desk, chair, and the air he breathed.

"Jaejoong only asks people to model for him if he's serious," Yoochun said just as Changmin slung his bag over his shoulder.

He stilled. Slowly, almost unwillingly, he turned to look at Yoochun, who was no longer smiling. Changmin didn't like this look either-it was calculating, curious, and... _knowing_. He felt like Yoochun was trying to read his mind, but already knew what he was going to find.

"W-what?"

He was being ridiculous...

Yoochun couldn't read minds. He couldn't know that Changmin had been thinking about Jaejoong for two days. Or that he was imagining himself on a runway in his designs instead of an operation room and a lab coat.

"I said," Yoochun repeated patiently. "Jaejoong wouldn't ask you to model if he didn't mean it."

He tried to look nonchalant. Like Yoochun's words didn't have his heart doing back flips, twirls, and freaking chasses.

"R-right..." he swallowed. "And why are you telling me this?"

Yoochun gave a lazy shrug. "He's my friend. You didn't say hello this morning, sit with us at lunch, or praise his very existence," he was grinning again. "He was a little upset."

"I never praise his existence."

Sighing, Yoochun nodded solemnly. "I know...you may want to try and compliment his hair at least. I don't think I can take any more text messages asking me if he's still pretty."

Changmin rolled his eyes. He couldn't believe Jaejoong actually complained to Yoochun that he wasn't (visibly) worshiping him.

Actually...

He fought back a grin-

-yes he could.

He shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. Jaejoong's incessant need for attention was _not_...cute. Or endearing. Or charming. Or anything else that meant Changmin was clearly losing his mind.

"I'll think about it..." he muttered, before hurrying out of the library.

He didn't look back to see if Yoochun was following him. Nor did he see the pleased smile that had stretched across Yoochun's lips. Because he had to leave. The library was hot and he had to get home.

And besides...he didn't need to think about it.

He already had...

For two days.

But when he found himself in front of the costume shop, he froze.

Ok...

Maybe he should have thought about it more.

He stared at the door. Bored black, smoking holes into it. He shouldn't be doing this. It made no sense anyway. He was going to be a doctor. He was supposed to be studying. He wasn't supposed to like someone he barely knew. _Especially_ when that someone had an entire school full of students that would probably string him up the flagpole if he ever dared to look at Jaejoong in the wrong way.

He just...didn't want Jaejoong's designs to go to waste. That was all...

Jaejoong didn't need to know that Changmin was fairly certain he was developing a condition that caused his heart to do funny, fluttering things whenever Jaejoong was too close.

The longer he stood there, the more he was beginning to think it was a bad idea. Jaejoong could get Yunho to wear the designs; they were the same height, it would work.

Yes...Yunho could do it.

That didn't make him tense or jealous at all.

Just as he turned to leave, the door opened.

"Changmin?" Junsu was standing in the doorway, looking curiously at him. He was wearing his school uniform which meant his costume fitting must have finished already. "What are you doing here?"

Fighting the urge to glance behind Junsu, Changmin replied with an intelligent, "U-um..."

"Are you looking for Jaejoong?"

"Y-yeah..." he stammered out. His heart thumped nervously against his chest. Why did he feel like Junsu had caught him somewhere he wasn't supposed to be? Jaejoong was his friend...right? He was allowed to look for his friend after school for no reason even though they hadn't talked in two days, and the costume room was on the other side of the school from the library. That was completely normal...

Junsu tilted his head. He had the same questioning and calculated look as Yoochun.

Changmin shifted under his gaze.

Still watching Changmin with a curious expression, Junsu pointed down the hall. "He went to the dance studio."

Changmin blinked. Jaejoong? Dancing?

Seemingly reading his mind, Junsu smiled. "He's not dancing." There was a short pause in which Junsu frowned thoughtfully. "At least I don't think he is...I haven't heard any ambulance sirens yet..."

Changmin laughed. Laughed out of relief that Junsu was no longer looking at him like he was trying to decipher some problem he was sure he knew the answer to. He laughed because his nerves told him that Junsu was going to ask why he was looking for Jaejoong. Laughed because the image of Jaejoong tripping over his feet as he attempted to dance, sent a wave of affection through his bones and muscles.

"The new kid invited him to watch his practice," Junsu added.

Like that, Changmin stopped laughing. He stared at Junsu, who was regarding him carefully again.

"Apparently Jaejoong said something about designing a dance outfit and-"

Changmin spun on his heel and marched down the hallway towards the dance room. Junsu called behind him, but he didn't hear it. His mind was too busy coming up with hundreds of different scenarios in which Jaejoong decided he no longer wanted Changmin to model for him, and filled sketchbooks with figures that looked like the new kid instead of him.

What was his name again?

Matsushita Yuya?

He remembered him sitting with Jaejoong that day at lunch. Hunched over a sketchbook. Smiling. Leaning too close. Touching Jaejoong's arm. His shoulder. And doing everything that had Changmin stabbing at his lunch, imagining every morsel as Matsushita's face.

He saw Jaejoong smiling in a way that made Changmin nearly snap his chopsticks in half. That smile, the one full of child-like enthusiasm, was supposed to be seen in the library while Changmin was sitting across from him-not in the middle of the courtyard in front of some new kid that barely spoke Korean.

The lights to the studio were on, and Changmin could see Jaejoong's reflection in the mirror through the small window in the door. He was sitting on the floor in the corner, with his knees pulled up, and a sketchbook resting on his legs. His pencil was moving in familiar long and short strokes that Changmin had long since memorized. He could hear the soft scratching in his ears as if he and Jaejoong were back in the library.

He didn't see Matsushita as he moved across the floor to a muffled beat. His eyes were fixed on Jaejoong. Watching with growing agitation every time Jaejoong's eyes glanced up to look at Matsushita. His fists clenched again when the music stopped. Someone-Matsushita-must have said something, because Jaejoong's hand flew to his mouth to hide his smile as he laughed.

Something inside him snapped. Like an electrical cord pulled too tight. His skin twitched and prickled with irritation. Before he could talk himself out of doing something extremely stupid and embarrassing, he slammed the door open.

Everyone-including Jaejoong-jumped at the noise.

He didn't let himself feel relieved that there were four other dancers in the room, who were all fan club members. Because all that mattered was the fact that Jaejoong was here with Matsushita instead of the library.

He ignored the stares. He heard someone ask him what he was doing there, but he ignored that too as he strode across the studio towards Jaejoong.

Feeling irrationally angry, he glared down at him.

"C-Changmin," Jaejoong's eyes widened. "W-what-?"

"-I'll model for you."

Jaejoong blinked.

Changmin stared back, hardly believing his own words. He was intensely aware that Matsushita and the others were staring at him as if he had gone insane.

Maybe he had.

Maybe he was crazy.

But none of that mattered.

"I said..." he stepped closer so their feet knocked together, and Jaejoong had to crane his neck to look up at him. "I'll model for you...at the school festival."

Jaejoong stared, eyes wide, mouth slightly agape. And suddenly Changmin came back to his senses. What was he doing? He just...stormed into a room full of people, and now he was standing here with Jaejoong staring at him.

He had to go. Before Jaejoong told him Matsushita was going to model for him instead. Because he couldn't handle that...

He was just about to step back when Jaejoong smiled brightly.

"Really?" He jumped up, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

Changmin felt a petty sense of satisfaction as the sketchbook full of models who weren't him, fell facedown to the floor.

He grinned, and was seized with the desire to tease him. "You have to call me 'hyung' first."

Jaejoong laughed and threw his arms around his neck.

Changmin's eyes widened. His heart hammered incessantly against his chest trying to escape. He hadn't expected Jaejoong to hug him.

Jaejoong let out a whiny, delighted, "Hyu-u-u-ng."

That was enough to make Changmin push him away. His face red, and his nerves shooting electric currents through his body as his pulse tried to beat its way out.

Jaejoong grinned. "You have to do it now."

Dazed, Changmin nodded. "Yeah..." he breathed. Swallowing, he tried to sound somewhat normal, but his skin was still tingling and warm where Jaejoong had pressed against him. "Yeah I will...."

He was rewarded with another hug.

After releasing him too quickly, Jaejoong picked up his things. "If you back out you have to call him hyung-nim!" he said as he hurried out of the room.

His body was light and everything was perfect as he left the studio to head home. He even managed a cheerful wave and friendly goodbye to a confused and shell-shocked Matsushita.

The evening, his homework was finished in record time, and he spent the rest of the night looking up fashion sites and modeling agencies.


	9. Chapter 9

"I look ridiculous."

"You look fine. Shut up and hold still."

"This wasn't in your sketchbook," Changmin continued to grumble, twisting left and right, frowning at his reflection in the mirror.

Jaejoong clicked his tongue impatiently, and forced him straight again. "That's because I drew it last year, and have been working on this since June."

Changmin blinked at him in surprise through the mirror. "Really?"

Trying not to sound _too_ pleased with himself, Jaejoong nodded and replied, "Suits are hard..." he tugged on the sleeve, pinned the edge where he wanted it, and moved to adjust the front.

His fingers brushed lightly against Changmin's collarbone as he adjusted the swopping neck of the grey leopard print shirt underneath the jacket. He felt Changmin twitch and his breathing hitch. Looking up, he saw him looking resolutely in the other direction and swallow.

Jaejoong only just noticed how close they were...

Suddenly embarrassed, he quickly stabbed a few pins into the shirt to tighten up the neckline so it didn't droop so low, but kept it wide enough for the collarbones to peak through.

"A-anyway..." he continued, moving away to the table that held his other pins and needles. He didn't really need any-he had plenty in the pincushion attached to his wrist-but he had to step away from Changmin. "Windowpane patterns are in."

He picked up a few more pins before tackling the other arm of the suit, careful not to touch anything but the fabric. For some reason, he was finding it hard to look at Changmin.

Changmin snorted. "Who thinks giant, ugly, grid patterns are attractive?"

Jaejoong looked up to glare at him, and froze. Changmin was staring back with a disgruntled look. Heat rose up to his cheeks and his head filled with so many things that he couldn't sort a single one out.

Clearing his throat, he forced Changmin to turn around so he could work on...not staring at his face.

Truthfully, he already finished the back of the suit, but he busied himself with re-checking every pin and straightening the collar.

With Changmin's back to him, he could think a little clearer, and replied. "Basically everyone in the fashion industry has used this pattern."

When he could find nothing else to nitpick about the suit, he told Changmin he could change.

Just as he was removing the suit jacket, Yuya entered the room, and let out an enthusiastic, "Waaahh! Changmin-san looks so good!"

Jaejoong smirked triumphantly. "See?"

Changmin stilled. His bare shoulders peeking out from the half-removed jacket. He didn't move as Yuya bounced over.

"Is this the suit you told me about?" he asked Jaejoong excitedly. "The one..." he paused, trying to think of the correct Korean words, "...uh... Jin Ah nee-san's dress... _desu ne_?"

Jaejoong cast a wary look over at Changmin, who may have turned into a statue. He hadn't told him that the suit was part of a couple look-it was made it to match the dress he finished over the summer.

Well actually....he hadn't told Changmin that all of the outfits were couple looks.

" _S-sou_...y-yeah _"_ he tried to smile, but it was strained and didn't quite meet his eyes. "What are you doing here, Yuya?"

"Ah... _sou da..."_ Yuya turned away from Changmin's still figure to smile at Jaejoong. "L'arc~en~ciel!"

Jaejoong blinked. Even Changmin turned his head with a confused look.

"Ah...um....y-you...like them...right? L'arc~en~ciel."

Changmin's eyes narrowed.

Jaejoong nodded, still dumbfounded. They had talked about the Japanese rock back a few days ago, but still couldn't understand why Yuya had burst into the costume room just to talk about them...

"DVDs!"

Jaejoong continued to stare.

A little sheepishly, Yuya said, " _Raibu no DVD wo mitsuketa..."_

Mitsuketa....

Jaejoong had no idea what that meant.

He tilted his head.

"I...don't know the word..." Yuya admitted, laughing nervously. "Um...a-anyway... _issho ni_ _mimashou ka?"_

"Watch a DVD together?" he asked, hoping he was understanding the Japanese correctly.

Yuya nodded enthusiastically. Changmin tensed, and walked away, removing the jacket as he went. Jaejoong watched out of the corner of his eye, worry creeping under his skin. He looked so...irritated.

"J-Jaejoong?"

Yuya was looking at him apprehensively . "Tomorrow...would you...?"

Changmin chucked the jacket on the table with all of his other things, and removed the leopard print shirt with so much force, he nearly ripped it.

"YAH!"

Yuya forgotten, he stormed over to Changmin, who was now standing shirtless in front of him. His muscles weren't developed but there was a natural tone to them. He swallowed. Fighting back the urge to stare, Jaejoong glared up at him.

"Do you know how long that took me to make?! I made that shirt from scratch! It was nothing but a hunk of fabric last week!"

Changmin grabbed his school shirt and pulled it on. Buttoning up the front without even looking at Jaejoong.

"YAH!" Jaejoong threw his hands down on Changmin's bag just as he reached for it. They glared at each other. "I'm talking to you!"

Changmin scowled at him and tugged roughly at the strap of his bag, ripping it from under Jaejoong's hands and making him fall sideways. He barely managed to stay on his feet.

"Yeah...hunk of fabric...see you tomorrow..." Changmin muttered.

Flushed, angry, and confused, Jaejoong went after him. He offered a soft apology to Yuya who was watching them without a word for a second time, with a mixture of confusion and slight disappointment. It was the kind of look someone had after learning his crush was already dating someone.

He felt guilty for leaving Yuya behind, but Changmin was just so...damn....frustrating!

"YAH! Changmin!" he shouted down the hall at the quickly retreating figure, who only sped up at the sound of his voice.

What the hell?!

Jaejoong jogged to catch up.

Once he was in reaching distance, he grabbed Changmin's arm. He stumbled forward a few steps as Changmin tried to keep walking, and stopped abruptly.

"What-the-hell..." he panted.

Chanmgin frowned and glanced over his shoulder. When Yuya emerged from the costume room, he shook Jaejoong's arm away and continued walking. "Nothing..." he muttered.

"Changmin-!"

"-your friend is waiting..." Changmin interrupted. Without slowing down, he turned the corner and disappeared.

Yuya appeared by his side, but Jaejoong just turned on his heel, stormed back to the costume shop, and locked the door behind him.

Damn Changmin.

He threw the pincushion still wrapped around his wrist, onto his pile of sewing supplies.

What was his problem?

He picked up the leopard shirt-it was still warm-and carefully spread it on the table, smoothing the wrinkles, and noticing a stray pin sticking out.

With a childish sense of vengeance, Jaejoong hoped it had scratched Changmin.

"Would serve you right..." he muttered under his breath. "My poor shirt..."

He thread the pin back through, and hung the shirt, before doing the same with the jacket. Tomorrow he was supposed to start working on the pants. Hopefully Changmin showed up.

If he did...

Jaejoong was going to turn him into a giant porcupine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please forgive me if any of my Japanese sounds weird.
> 
> Also, "mistuketa" means "I found..."


	10. Chapter 10

When Jaejoong asked Changmin to model during lunch because he was going to Yoochun's to study that night (though Changmin doubted they studied as much as they claimed to), he had agreed, with a stomach-lurching happiness. Once the bell rang, Changmin noted with some disappointment that Yoochun and Junsu came along, and Yunho soon followed after when they met in the hall.

Ok. No problem. He liked Jaejoong's friends. It wasn't like Changmin was looking forward to spending time alone with Jaejoong or anything...

It wasn't until Jaejoong told him to change in the costume shop and follow him to the dance studio that he became suspicious.

"Why?" he tried keeping his voice casual, but his body tensed as he eyed Jaejoong.

"I need you, Yuya, Nana, Ara, and Yunho to model the finished outfits today," Jaejoong replied distractedly as his rifled through the rack of his designs - everything was complete except for two. "The costume shop isn't big enough for the four of you and the fan club is choosing the winner of the fan fiction writing contest today, so people are going to be - what?"

Changmin was looking at him with a mixture of disgusted exasperation and confusion. "Fan fiction contest?"

"I told you that they hold a contest every year that chooses someone to model an outfit for me..."

"But _fan fiction?_ "

Jaejoong shrugged as Yoochun chortled by the door. Jaejoong threw him an annoyed look. Grabbing the hat he was looking for, he left, with Yoochun and Changmin trailing close behind.

"It changes every year. This year was fan fiction," Jaejoong said. Changmin could see a faint flush of pink on his cheeks. "It's not like I read it..."

"Do you _want_ to read it?!" Changmin asked incredulously.

Jaejoong blushed a deeper shade of red and didn't answer, making Yoochun laugh again.

"Yoohwan told me the winner was...steamy," he snickered.

Changmin gave Yoochun a horrified look. How was this amusing?! It was bad enough he knew his little sister wrote that stuff about celebrities. But Jaejoong wasn't a celebrity. He was just a high school student receiving an unhealthy amount of attention from his classmates.

Yoochun threw an arm around his shoulders as they entered the dance studio, which, predictably, was packed with people. The fan club was on one end with a gaggle of about a dozen girls, on the other side was another group of girls, and somewhere between the two standing by the mirrors, was Matsushita, Im Jin Ah (who insisted on being called Nana), Yunho, Junsu, and Go Ara, who he had only ever said 'hello' to. He noted with some dread that Kyuhyun and Minho were also there, grinning at him like seeing him in damaged jeans, a long green jacket, and black sweater was the most amusing sight in the world. Nana was dressed similarly with a cute green dress, brown boots, and the floppy, broad-brimmed, brown hat Jaejoong had handed to her. They were coupled up for every outfit - something Changmin found relieving. Nana was chatty and bright, but had a sharp tongue that made the few fitting sessions with her, entertaining. Plus, she had no interest in Jaejoong, and that was enough for Changmin.

She greeted him cheerfully as always, and complimented his look.

Hyun Joong stood shortly after they arrived, said a few words, and stated the contest winner would be announced 10 minutes before the end of the lunch period. When he sat down, Jaejoong directed Yunho, Ara, Changmin, and Nana towards the side where their friends sat, so he could work on Matsushita.

Yoochun immediately fit himself between Yunho and Ara as Changmin stood in the corner with Nana, Kyuhyun, and Minho.

Everyone had pulled out their lunches and chatted happily as Jaejoong fussed over Matsushita's outfit - a black, shiny dance piece that seemed to flutter and flow around him with every small step. Changmin hated having to admit that he looked good. A few girls let out delighted squeals as Jaejoong asked Matsushita to dance a bit so he could see how the fabric moved.

He did, eliciting a number of cat calls and claps. Matsushita smiled at the floor and blushed.

Changmin's jaw clenched as he watched Jaejoong move forward to adjust a few things, pin some fabric here and there, and step back, directing Matsushita to move again.

"They're cute aren't they?" Nana asked conversationally.

Changmin snapped his head around so fast his neck cracked in several different places. "What?"

Miho and Kyunhyun snorted as Nana raised an eyebrow at him. "What?" she eyed him carefully. "You don't think so?"

Changmin turned away from her, trying not to scowl as he watched Matsushita laugh as Jaejoong attempted to show him a certain step he wanted to see. It took every ounce of self-control not to step forward as Jaejoong's feet tangled and he tripped into Matsushita, who caught him.

His hands clenched into fists as he saw Matsushita blush and straighten Jaejoong, who was laughing at his own clumsiness. What happened to the Jaejoong that had a mysterious "cat-like" grace in front of everyone but him? He didn't trip where people could see. He never stumbled when other people were around. That was a secret only Changmin knew (and perhaps Yunho, Yoochun, and Junsu), not the rest of their classmates. And certainly not Matsushita.

"No," he growled, watching Matsushita perform the move Jaejoong had attempted, flawlessly.

"Jealous?" Kyuhyun asked, slinging an arm around him.

Changmin shrugged him off. "No," he lied.

Minho exchanged grins with Kyuhyun. Nana's eyebrows rose further in disbelief.

"Liar."

"I'm not."

He stared straight ahead, not looking any of them, trying to pretend that Jaejoong wasn't too close to Matsushita as he re-adjusted his clothes again. He ignored the insane desire to force them apart, and reminded himself it was all for the fashion show. That rushing over and telling Jaejoong to stop being so touchy with someone other than him, was an overreaction.

"Do you..." Nana started, keeping her voice careful. "...like Jaejoong?"

His pulse jumped to his throat. He glanced at her, his face warm and his eyes wide. "W-what?"

"Do you like Jaejoong?"

Changmin turned back to staring ahead of him. Of course he liked Jaejoong. How could anyone _not_ like Jaejoong? He was nice, attractive, talented, kind, gentle, and damn it! Changmin had sworn not to turn into his other countless admirers, but it happened. And he didn't have a clue how to handle it...

Joining the fan club was _not_ going to happen. Nor was he going to chase Jaejoong around, asking for pictures and autographs.

He had no idea what he was going to do...

Luckily, Jaejoong had waved him and Nana over, and spared him from having to come up with a coherent answer.

Changmin didn't look at Matsushita. Didn't say anything to Jaejoong. He just let him tug on the jacket and his jeans, and moved up and down the dance floor with Nana next to him as he was instructed. Jaejoong had chastised him for looking too stiff, but said it was probably because of nerves ("this is going to be in front of the entire school in a few weeks, this is good practice," he said). After a few unsuccessful attempts to force Changmin to relax, Jaejoong sent them back to the corner, promising to help him with work with his apparently stage fright, and had Yunho and Ara do the same thing.

And then it was time to announce the winner of the fan fiction contest...

The fan club stood as Jaejoong moved away, looking embarrassed. Changmin tried not to roll his eyes as Hyun Joong announced that a fan fiction called _"Hot Summer Nights"_ written by a girl named Oh Min Ah, won. The girl squealed, jumped from her spot along the wall, and bounced over, looking as though she had just won the lottery.

Changmin watched as Jaejoong congratulated her, and told her to meet him after school the next day to start the fitting - she would be Matsushita's partner.

She beamed at Matsushita, who blushed and looked at his feet, mumbling, "Nice to meet you."

Jaejoong had taken a group picture with the other contest writers, and signed a few autographs, looking more than pleased with himself. Changmin rolled his eyes.

"This place is insane..." he muttered under his breath.

Soon, everyone began to disperse back to their classes, and Changmin left with Jaejoong and the other models to change back into their uniforms.

"Matsushita is so cute in that outfit!" Yunho gushed the moment they entered the costume shop. Yoochun scowled from his spot against the wall.

Matsushita smiled shyly. "Thanks..."

"Of course he looks cute!" Jaejoong said proudly, grinning and slinging an arm around him. "I made the outfit."

Everyone but Changmin and Matsushita laughed - Changmin turned his back towards them and tried not to punch the wall, and Matsushita just stared and blushed at the floor.

"I heard a few girls say you looked like a couple," Nana said, once again displaying her shameless, blunt, honesty.

Ara smiled. "They do look like one don't they?" she let out a girlish squeal. "You two would be so cute!"

Changmin clenched his fists and tightened his jaw. He knew he shouldn't...knew that turning around or glancing in Jaejoong's direction would only make the ugly stir of jealousy in his stomach worsen.

But he did.

He turned around.

And saw Jaejoong's red face as he quickly let go of Matsushita and took two big steps back. Matsushita's eyes were wide and staring at Ara. Then he glanced at Jaejoong, then back at the floor.

Jaejoong's eyes met Changmin's. His eyes widened and he quickly looked away.

"I-it's...n-not like...t-that..." he stammered.

A tiny feeling of relief loosened the knot in his stomach, but, Changmin didn't like the way they had looked so flustered. Did he like Matsushita? They did have a lot in common...

What did he have in common with Jaejoong?

_Nothing_ , he answered himself.

He had nothing in common with Jaejoong.

Jaejoong liked fashion. Changmin liked books. Jaejoong liked Japanese rock. Changmin hardly listened to music. Jaejoong was popular. Changmin was not.

Matsushita liked fashion. He liked Japanese rock. He was popular.

And slowly his anger ebbed away into resigned disappointment.

He gathered his things without looking at anyone, and left.

What was he thinking?

Liking Jaejoong was going to be a failure from the start. With or without Matsushita...

 

He had his head buried in his arms, still wallowing in his own insecurities, when something landed on his desk with a heavy _slap_.

When he looked up, Yoochun was grinning at him and pointing at the papers he threw on Changmin's desk, bound together with a large binder clip. The front page read, _"Hot Summer Nights."_

Changmin frowned at it.

"What's this?"

"Fan fiction."

"I see that. Why did you put it on my desk?"

Grin widening, Yoochun shrugged and continued to his seat.

Changmin turned to demand an answer, but the bell signaling the beginning of afternoon classes rang, and he was forced to turn back to the front.

He stared at the front page, with the intense urge to chuck the thing back at Yoochun, when a piece of paper landed on his desk.

A note from Yoochun.

_Just open to the front page._

He scowled. He didn't _want_ to open the front page. He knew what fan fiction usually entailed. And Yoochun had said it was ' _steamy_.' Why would he want to read something like that involving Jaejoong?!

Another note from Yoochun landed on his desk.

_If you don't I'll get the teacher to read it instead._

Changmin scoffed but opened to the front page anyway. It wasn't like it mattered to _him_ if the fan fiction got confiscated and read to the class, it wasn't like he wrote-

He froze.

His eyes widened as he read the pairing listed just below the title and author name.

_Jaejoong/Changmin._

He hastily shoved it in his school bag and tried to ignore Yoochun's quiet laughter behind him.

Someone had written a fan fiction about him. And Jaejoong. Why?

He tried to ignore the tiny flutter of happiness in his chest. He should be creeped out. He hardly knew anyone in the school, why would anyone write _fan fiction_ about him? About him with Jaejoong?

_'Steamy...'_ Yoochun's voice chimed in his head.

He swallowed.

Did they really look like a couple?

His face was so red that his teacher actually asked if he had a fever. He shook his head, and hid his face the rest of class, pretending to be immersed in his note taking.

When a note from Jaejoong landed on his desk to ask if he was really ok, he just nodded.

When the final bell rang, he practically ran from class, and straight home.

The next morning, when Yoochun asked if he had read the story, he lied, muttering, "Of course not...who would read something that ridiculous?"

He had read the entire thing. Twice.


	11. Chapter 11

_Tap. Tap. Tap._

Jaejoong tightened his grip on his pencil, as he tried not to look up.

Changmin had been tapping his pen against the table for the last 15 minutes. Each time, the sound seemed to echo loudly in his ears, destroying his concentration.

Normally, it didn't bother him. Jaejoong had spent several weeks sitting in the same spot, across from Changmin, in the library, listening to the rhythmic taps against the table or a notebook. But today, each tap was sharp, loud, and interrupted every thought.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if Changmin wasn't staring at him.

_Tap. Tap. Tap._

With an annoyed huff, Jaejoong looked up from his math homework - the only reason he joined Changmin in the library today instead of finishing Junsu's Dracula outfit. He frowned.

"What?"

With a small ' _tch_ ,' he answered, "You're staring at me."

Changmin raised an eyebrow. "I know."

Jaejoong's pulse jumped to his throat. What did he mean by that?

Suddenly uncomfortable, he bit his lip and looked away. Silence stretched between them, and he could feel Changmin still watching him. If it went on much longer, Changmin may just burn a hole through his head with the way he was staring...

"So do you think Nana's right about Matsushita?" Changmin asked a little too casually, though Jaejoong knew he heard a hint of menace underneath the question.

Flushing, he snapped his head up and stared back at Changmin with wide eyes. "What?!" he nearly yelled, earning stares from the few people around them.

He smiled and bowed his head apologetically before turning back to Changmin, hissing, "What are you talking about?"

Changmin shrugged. " You know...about looking like a couple...everyone thinks he likes you. "

Jaejoong laughed. "Yuya?" he laughed again. "That's completely ridiculous! Well...ok _everyone_ likes me, but that's like... _Yoochun_ liking me," he grinned at Changmin, who was not smiling back. "Completely absurd."

When Changmin continued to stare, his smile faded.

"We're just friends." he said firmly, though he wasn't really sure why he had to defend himself. So what if Yuya _did_ like him? Half the school had a crush on him. In fact, he just turned down a cute 2nd year girl the other day.

Changmin snorted and turned his attention back to his homework. "Okay, whatever you say."

Jaejoong frowned. That was it? He stared at Changmin a while longer. Something was...off. Changmin's shoulders were a little more tense, and his eyes weren't moving. He was just staring at the textbook and flipping the pages at random intervals.

Hesitantly, he asked, "Would it bother you?"

Changmin paused halfway through turning a page. Jaejoong watched him, holding his breath, almost wishing he hadn't said anything. But he had a strange feeling...like it _did_ bother Changmin.

He felt a shiver of happiness at the thought.

Jaejoong had been thinking about Changmin for three months - thinking about how his fingers tingled after every fitting session because they were constantly brushing against some part of Changmin; thinking about how his designs fit Changmin perfectly; thinking about the smile that caused Changmin's eyes to mismatch whenever Jaejoong shared his lunch, or when something particularly amused him.

But Changmin was...confusing. Jaejoong couldn't figure him out at all. One minute he was happy. The next, he was storming off and not speaking to Jaejoong for days. Jaejoong still had no idea if Changmin even considered them friends.

"...Yes."

Lost in thought, Jaejoong blinked and looked up, confused. "What?"

Changmin looked away, cheeks pink as he clumsily gathered up his books. "It would...bother me...." he mumbled quietly - Jaejoong almost didn't catch it.

Shocked, Jaejoong watched as Changmin attempted escape. Again.

Why was Changmin always walking away after saying confusing things that made his head spin? It wasn't fair. It made Jaejoong think impossible things. Like maybe Changmin was jealous of Yuya. He always seemed colder and more distant when the other boy was around. Jaejoong hadn't noticed at first, but now...

He reached out and grabbed the strap of Changmin's bag before he could leave. Jaejoong wasn't going to let him run off without an explanation. Not this time.

Changmin's shoulders tensed.

"You always walk off...you can't just tell me it bothers you that Yuya might like me, and then take off...it's not right..." ' _it's confusing..'._ he added silently.

"I just don't..." Changmin tried pulling away, but Jaejoong tightened his grip.

"Is it because we're both guys?" he asked carefully, dread creeping under his skin. What if that was it? What if Changmin thought it was disgusting for two guys to be in a relationship?

"No," Changmin answered immediately. "I don't care...what gender..." his voice was so quiet that Jaejoong had to strain his ears to hear. His heart leapt even though his mind told him not to get his hopes up.

"Then what?"

Changmin hesitated. Jaejoong thought he wasn't going to answer when he replied, "I just don't think you work together...that's all..."

He turned just enough to force Jaejoong to release his hold on the bag, and raised an eyebrow at him. "Good enough?"

Despite the cool tone, Jaejoong could see a faint tinge of pink on his cheeks. Swallowing, he nodded, and Changmin left.

 

The next afternoon, he was alone with Yuya in the costume room. Jaejoong had just finalized his outfit, and the girl he was partnered with finally left after several, giggling 'thank yous' and words of praise for the outfit she would be modeling alongside Yuya.

"You sure you don't mind choreographing another routine?" Jaejoong asked in surprisingly good Japanese, feeling a little guilty at the last minute request. The girl, Min Ah, who had won the fanfiction contest, also happened to dance, and Jaejoong thought it would be nice addition to the show.

Yuya smiled and shook his head. " _Zen zen daijoubu!_ It's completely ok!"

"I know you have the dance show..." Jaejoong continued.

Yuya shrugged and replied in simple Korean - he was getting much better already. "I like to dance. It's only a minute long. It will be fun!"

He handed Jaejoong an armful of clothes to hang on the racks. Their fitting session often ended like this - with the other models going home well before Jaejoong, leaving him to pick up around the costume shop. Yuya usually stayed to help though.

Jaejoong watched the other boy from the other side of the clothes rack as he hung one of the outfits.

Did Yuya like him?

He hung Nana's dress next to Changmin's outfit and frowned.

"Jaejoong?"

Yuya was suddenly in front of him. A little too close...

Jaejoong swallowed and stepped back. "W-what is it?" he asked, feeling nervous. Though not as nervous as Yuya looked...he was biting his lip and not looking Jaejoong in the eye.

He swallowed again. He knew that look...

He didn't want to see it. Because he knew what Yuya was going to say before he even opened his mouth. It was the same way everyone who ever confessed to him looked before they finally gathered the courage, and were inevitably turned down. Jaejoong liked Yuya...he didn't want to hurt him...but...

"Do you...think..." he started, looking hesitant. "I mean...what Nana said...about looking like a couple..." his face was red now, and he still refused to look at Jaejoong.

Jaejoong fought back a sigh. "Yu-"

"-I like you," he said quickly, finally looking up. His eyes locked with Jaejoong's, nervous, unsure, but determined. When Jaejoong held his gaze without replying, he looked away again. "I mean...I know...you always have people..." he trailed off, his heavy Japanese accent, thickening. "...I just...wanted...you to know...maybe..."

Jaejoong sighed as he looked at Yuya sympathetically. He really hated love confessions. He always felt horrible afterwards. But what could he do? The only person that ever made him _want_ a confession wasn't standing in front of him. He was in the library....probably scribbling down some medical term neither of them truly understood.

Before Jaejoong could reply, Yuya stepped forward and kissed him. It was quick, and Yuya staggered away before Jaejoong had a chance to react.

Blushing, Yuya went back to biting his lip and avoiding Jaejoong's eyes. "Just...think about it..." he mumbled, before turning away and hurrying out of the costume shop.

Jaejoong watched him go. Eyes wide, mind blank, and cheeks bright red. He took a deep breath and slowly let it out.

Deftly pulling out his phone, he pressed the 2nd number on his speed dial.

"Yoochun...want some ddukbokki?"

Yoochun invited him over immediately. Jaejoong didn't know when it started, but ddukbokki became shorthand for "I need to talk."

He stopped at the store to grab the needed ingredients, and Yoohwan greeted him at the door with a bright smile and excited, "Hyung!"

Admittedly, it was still weird knowing that his best friend's little brother was part of the fan club, but over the past year, Jaejoong had mostly gotten used to it. He still remembered Yoohwan proudly declaring the night before he started his first year, that he was going to join. Both Yoochun and Jaejoong tried convincing him not to, but Yoohwan insisted - he had idolized Jaejoong almost as much as Yoochun. In fact, if there was a Park Yoochun fan club, he probably would have joined.

After thanking Mrs. Park for giving up her kitchen, he went to work. Whether it was the smell of rice cakes and hot pepper paste, or simply having Yoochun sitting on the counter, swinging his legs as they chatted, that put his mind at ease, Jaejoong had a habit of cooking at the Park's whenever something was on his mind. Since he always left the entire dish at the house, neither of Yoochun's parents complained.

It took several attempts and a promise from Jaejoong to cook a special lunch, before Yoohwan left the kitchen.

Once they were finally alone, Jaejoong told Yoochun everything - including his conversation with Changmin the day before.

When he was finished, Yoochun let out a low whistle. "So...what are you going to do?"

Jaejoong picked out one of the rice cakes and held it out for Yoochun to taste. "More pepper..." he said.

"Isn't that why I'm here?" he muttered, dumping more pepper in the dish than it probably needed.

Yoochun shrugged. "Seems simple to me. You like Changmin. You don't like Yuya...at least not in that way..."

"But-"

"You've turned down just about everyone in the school, Jae...this isn't really that different."

Jaejoong sighed. True...it wasn't...but no one had ever kissed him. And he felt oddly guilty about it...what if Changmin found out?

He held out another rice cake for Yoochun, who choked. Grinning, he turned off the heat and served up the dish.

"Are you trying to kill me?!" Yoochun gasped, taking a large gulp of water.

Jaejoong grinned and popped one of the rice cakes in his mouth. It burned on the way down, and set his mouth on fire - perfect.

Jaejoong still had no idea what to do about Yuya or his feelings for Changmin, but at least he had the weekend to think about it...

God help him when Monday arrived...


	12. Chapter 12

Changmin frowned as he watched Jaejoong adjust Matsushita's outfit and instructed him to perform the minute-long dance routine that would be a part of his walk down the make-shift runway next week.

Something was...off. As much as Changmin hated it, the two were usually chatty and amicable around each other. Giggling and joking over Matsushita's poor Korean or Jaejoong's attempts to mimic Matsushita's dancing. But the awkwardness was worse. It made Changmin imagine things he didn't want to - like perhaps something happened. Did Matsushita confess to Jaejoong? Did _Jaejoong_ confess-?

He shook his head. No. Absolutely not. He was being ridiculous. The fashion show was a week away...Jaejoong was just focused. And Matsushita was always awkward around him unless they were talking. Changmin was just imagining things...even the fact that Jaejoong seemed to be avoiding him.

Totally imagined.

Jaejoong was definitely not purposely working on every model before him even though he was the first to arrive and change. And it was purely coincidence that Jaejoong was looking everywhere but him, even though he had been not-so-subtly staring the entire afternoon.

He watched as Jaejoong shuffled over, still not looking at him. He didn't even offer a 'hello' or any kind of greeting as he started checking Changmin's outfit. His movements were jerky and imprecise - Changmin was thankful they didn't have to pin anything today.

"You're twitchy today..." he commented, trying to sound nonchalant.

Jaejoong jumped and quickly moved away to retrieve a blue and brown striped scarf that was sitting on a nearby table.

Yeah....

He was definitely avoiding Changmin.

"What's up with you?" he asked when Jaejoong returned and draped the scarf around his neck. He was still carefully avoiding Changmin's gaze.

"What do you mean?"

Changmin glanced over at Matsushita, who was standing a little ways away from Nana and Min Ah (Yunho and Ara had already left), with glum expression. Even with his limited Korean, this was the first time Changmin ever saw Matsushita off by himself instead of cheerfully trying to chat with everyone.

"You and Matsushita have been acting strange all afternoon...did something happen?"

"No," he answered a little too quickly. "N-not at all...go stand by Nana so I can make sure the scarf isn't too much..."

Changmin did as he was told despite everything inside him demanding to know why Jaejoong had clearly just lied.

He went through the motions of walking down the "runway" with Nana next to him, and posing at the end like a couple. Jaejoong had them hold hands, walk with Nana on his arm, and again with his arm around her shoulders, trying to decide which was the best "couple" look for this particular outfit. Changmin didn't look way from Jaejoong the entire time.

If Jaejoong didn't want to talk about it, then fine - Changmin would just wait until everyone left. But one way or another, he was going to find out. Because if he didn't, then he would go crazy with images of Matsushita confessing and Jaejoong accepting...and then Changmin would have to act like the supportive friend when they went on dates and walked down the hallways holding hands and-

"Changmin?"

Nana waved a hand in front of his face. She smiled when he looked at her. "We can change."

Nodding, he headed towards the table that had his clothes piled on top. He didn't look at Jaejoong as he passed, and Jaejoong didn't look at him.

The door opened just as Changmin reached for his clothes. Yoohwan and two fan club members Changmin was sure were named Siwan and Junhyung, entered, looking nervous but excited. They had cameras around their necks...

"Hyung!" Yoohwan announced their presence loudly and with a confidence no other fan club member possessed when addressing Jaejoong - Changmin supposed having Jaejoong's best friend as your older brother had its advantages.

When Jaejoong saw his fan club members, his tense expression immediately brightened.

"Hyung," Yoohwan bounced into the room excitedly. "Can Siwan and Junhyung take pictures of your models before they change?"

Jaejoong tilted his head, looking cutely and politely confused. Changmin fought the urge to roll his eyes - Jaejoong had completely slipped into his role as school idol.

"We want to do a photobook," Junhyung said quickly, looking nervous about having Jaejoong's full attention.

"It's for a photography project," Siwan added quickly, blushing when Jaejoong looked at him and smiled.

"Don't you want pictures of the show?"

The three nodded vigorously. "We want both! Like behind the scenes and on stage." Junhyung answered.

As usual, Jaejoong's fan club members had the worst timing...Changmin really just wanted to change and wait for everyone to leave so he could talk to Jaejoong...

Unfortunately, Jaejoong agreed, and asked everyone to stay a bit longer.

"Actually..." Siwan bit his lip, and hesitated before quickly rambling out, "We-were-hoping-you-would-join-and-we-can-reenact-the-winning-fanfiction-if-that's-ok-with-you."

He stared at the ground, blushing a deep red, looking as if he regretted his words the moment they left his mouth.

 Min Ah, the girl responsible for the fanfiction currently hidden under medical textbooks and college test prep books in Changmin's desk, squealed in delight.

"YES! Please, it would be so perfect!" she bounced up and down, her hands clasped together as she looked from Jaejoong to Siwan.

Changmin stared, wide-eyed at Siwan, before looking at Jaejoong. Please....no. Anything but that, he begged silently. It was bad enough he had read the story more than once, but he did not want to think about what kind of poses they would be doing. Every intimate scene flashed to the forefront of his mind, and he had to look away from Jaejoong.  The story didn't even have much of a plot. Changmin was pretty sure their characters hardly wore any clothes - the logic being that they were at a beach resort. He swallowed as he remembered a particularly explicit scene that somehow ended up in a lifeguard tower (he still didn't quite understand how it happened, but concluded that fanfiction writers' imaginations defied physics and logic).

Of course...he couldn't even point out the other problem: the love triangle was between him, Jaejoong, and Yoochun - not Matsushita, who was the only other male model present.

Jaejoong met his eyes briefly, and Changmin tried to plead silently for him to turn down the suggestion.

"I...don't know..." Jaejoong replied, looking back at Siwan, and looking embarrassed. Changmin let out a sigh of relief. A photoshoot he could handle - he liked Nana and didn't mind posing as a couple - but reenacting a fanfiction in which he and Jaejoong were the main couple was definitely a bad idea.

"Hy-u-u-ng," Yoohwan whined. "It'll be so cool! Come on! You don't even need to change, and we can tweak the concept so Matsushita can fill in for my brother's role!"

Changmin nearly choked as Min Ah and Nana cheered their approval.

"You read it?" He gasped.

Yoohwan shrugged, unashamed. "Of course I did. Everyone in the fan club did, we had to determine a winner."

That explained where Yoochun had gotten a copy....

"Changmin and Yoochun were college students," Min Ah said quickly, " And Jaejoong was in High School, we can totally do that concept! It would be so hot!"

The others agreed immediately, with no concern over Changmin's horrified gaping, and Matsushita's bright red face. This wasn't happening...

He watched as Nana descended upon Jaejoong, loosening his tie, unbuttoning his school shirt, and revealing a black tank top and silver crown necklace that rested against the middle of his chest. She teased his hair, making the dangling cross earring peak through, and giving him the perfect image of a school rebel.

"Here..." she tossed his school jacket at him. "You can do whatever you want with this except wear it."

Jaejoong gave Changmin a helpless look, as if to say, 'I have no choice.'

As Nana shoved him forward, he tried not to scowl. Like hell he didn't have a choice. He just couldn't say no to his fan club. And Changmin...Changmin was pretty sure he forgot how to speak Korean. Because otherwise, why else was he allowing Nana to position him, and following along silently as Siwan and Junhyung gave them orders as their cameras clicked away.

Jaejoong stood between him and Matsushita, who seemed to have decided that whatever Jaejoong agreed to, was something he had to do. He was still blushing, and acting unsure of how to stand or where to put his hands. When Siwan ordered him to hold Jaejoong as though teaching him how to dance while Changmin attempted to pulled Jaejoong away, Matsushita nearly toppled to the ground, taking Jaejoong with him. Only Changmin's hold on Jaejoong's arm kept them up.

"S-sorry!" Matsushita squeaked.

Junhyung waved him off. "That's ok, Yuya. You're done, I think." He turned to Jaejoong and Changmin. "Can we get couple shots?"

Jaejoong nodded wordlessly, and Changmin sighed as they readjusted. He just wanted this day to end...

"Jaejoong-hyung, turn towards Changmin."

Jaejoong did.

"Changmin please step closer..." Siwan said, his camera going off as Changmin followed his direction, intensely aware of how his thighs bumped against Jaejoong's, and how close their chests were to touching.

He swallowed, and thought about unpleasant things - like the frogs they dissected in Biology last week, and the various stages of lung cancer he saw in the textbook he checked out of the library yesterday. He definitely wasn't thinking about how he could feel Jaejoong breathing, or how his position would be so much more comfortable with his arms around Jaejoong's waist rather than at his sides with his hands in his pockets.

They managed to avoid eye contact and kept their attention on the camera as they shifted, mindful not to touch each other if they could help it, but being so close, it was almost impossible.

"Jaejoong, look at Changmin!"

Hesitantly, Jaejoong's eyes traveled slowly up to meet his. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to continue looking at the camera or at Jaejoong, but the moment their eyes met, it didn't really matter. Nothing really mattered. Not even breathing. He could vaguely hear the girls' squeals, and the clicking of cameras, but  none of that really registered - Jaejoong was so close. Changmin only had to move his head down if he wanted to kiss him....

Jaejoong bit his lip, and tried to look away again.

Changmin reached up and gently pushed his face back towards him with his fingertips. He ran his thumb over Jaejoong's lips, forcing him to release his bite.

"You really should stop doing that," he murmured without thinking. It was a line from the fanfiction - his character did the exact same thing when Jaejoong bit his lips.

Someone squealed, bringing him back to his senses.

His eyes widened and he jumped away from Jaejoong as if his skin had suddenly turned white hot.

Not good.

Really...really not good.

Stupid. He was so stupid. What was he thinking?

The obvious answer was - he wasn't. He just...acted. And somehow he picked a moment from the fanfiction.

"Perfect! Oh my god that was so hot!" Min Ah was practically crying in her excitement, jumping up and down like she had just won the lottery. "I wrote that exact scene! Oh my god, Changmin did you read my fan fiction?!"

"N-no!" he lied, backing even further away from Jaejoong, waving his hands frantically. "I mean...I...heard it...from...uh...I just heard about it..." he refused to look at Jaejoong, who seemed to be doing the same.

"I...are we...done?" he looked at Siwan and Junhyung.

They nodded, still looking a bit thunderstruck, but oddly pleased - their pictures would no doubt cause a firestorm around the school once everyone saw them.

Wordlessly, Changmin grabbed his things, not looking at anyone, and ran to the dressing rooms.

Once alone, he leaned against the changing room door and let out a deep breath. He couldn't believe his own stupidity. He banged his head against the door. Jaejoong had been so close... _so close_. Changmin should have been happy he didn't kiss him, but somehow he was disappointed, and that terrified him. He didn't usually forget where he was, or who was around him, but with Jaejoong, it seemed to happen a lot - just like the day he stormed into the dance studio and told Jaejoong he would model for him, or the days in the library, when the only things around him were books, and Jaejoong.

What would he think about Changmin? Would he rightly assume Changmin liked him?

He banged his head against the door again. He would rather keep his secret and take it to the grave than be rejected...

He jumped as someone knocked softly on the door.

"Changmin?"

It was Jaejoong.


	13. Chapter 13

"Changmin..."

Changmin stood frozen against the door as Jaejoong knocked again. He swallowed. He didn't think Jaejoong would follow him...

His heart was racing and his breathing hitched. Maybe if he stayed perfectly still, Jaejoong would give up and leave. Maybe Changmin could transfer schools before tomorrow and never have to see Jaejoong again...

That wasn't overreacting at all...

There was another knock, and his pulse jumped into his throat. "Changmin, I know you're in there, what's wrong?" Jaejoong's quiet voice asked through the door, sounding confused. "Are you mad about the photoshoot? I'm sorry I'll-'

Changmin banged his head against the door again. Sighing loud enough for Jaejoong to hear. He was probably going to have a concussion or a heart attack before the day was over...

"I'm not mad..." he muttered.

There was a short pause.

"You sound mad," Jaejoong replied, sounding unconvinced.

Sighing again, he moved away from the door and yanked it open.

Jaejoong had been leaning against it and fell forward  - right into Changmin's arms. By now, it had almost become a habit; Changmin's arms always seemed to stretch out when Jaejoong fell.

"It's amazing you manage to make it through the day without breaking something..." he muttered as he helped Jaejoong stand straight again.

Jaejoong blushed and mumbled a small "thanks."

Changmin held on to his arms a little longer than was necessary before finally letting go. They were still standing too close, but Changmin couldn't bring himself to move. Jaejoong still wasn't looking at him, and instead fixated on a spot on the floor, chewing on his bottom lip.

"You seemed mad..." he said. "I was just...worried..."

Changmin was only half listening. He was too busy staring at his lips, thinking things he shouldn't. Matsushita still plagued the back of his mind. Thinking that Jaejoong liked Matsushita drove him completely insane...

He stepped closer. Jaejoong's head snapped up when he felt Changmin move. His eyes widened and his lips parted in a silent gasp. He stepped back, trying to recover his personal space, but Changmin stepped into it again.

He had no idea what he was doing...except maybe ruining their friendship.

Jaejoong stepped back again, and Changmin once again closed the distance.

This was a stupid, idiotic, impulsive, friendship-ending thing to do...but he was going crazy. Jaejoong was driving him insane, and this seemed to be the only way to maintain what little sanity he was clinging on to...

"Changmin, what-?" Jaejoong broke off with a sharp intake of breath when he was finally backed into the wall.

Changmin's pulse spiked again - Jaejoong was trapped between him and the wall, eyes wide and cheeks flushed. He didn't know if the sight was terrifying or exciting.

He still had no idea what he was doing. No idea what Jaejoong was thinking, or if they would still be friends after this. A simple confession seemed juvenile, and Changmin wasn't sure he could remember how to speak, anyway...

 Besides, actions spoke louder than words, right?

"I..." he hesitated before stepping close enough that their feet bumped. He was shaking, his nerves were finally catching up to his brain and what he was doing. They were telling him to back away...play everything off as a joke...because Jaejoong was going to reject him...

He took a deep breath. Crushed the nerves, and looked at Jaejoong. He was over-thinking this...he just had to...tell Jaejoong he liked him. Or...show him.

Easier said than done...he was still standing there, looking at Jaejoong like an idiot...

"Changmin..."

Before he completely lost his nerve, he swallowed again. "I'm...not very good at this..." he mumbled.

Jaejoong's brows knitted together and he tilted his head. "Good at what?"

His breathing hitched and he almost backed away again. Damn that look.

"J-just..." he stammered, trying to keep himself from running away.

He swallowed and glanced at Jaejoong's lips, half parted, red and chapped from the constant chewing.

"T-this..." he breathed, right before pressing his lips against Jaejoong's.

A light touch. Hesitant and unsure. His heart was racing, and his skin twitched with the mad desire to break away and run before Jaejoong had the chance to reject him. But he forced himself still. Waiting, hoping Jaejoong would respond.

When nothing happened, he pulled back. Panic stole through him...he just kissed Jaejoong and ruined everything...

"S-sorry..." he stepped back, trying not to let the disappointment overcome him.

Just has he turned away, Jaejoong's hand shot out and gripped the front of his shirt. He tugged Changmin back, causing him to stumble. He caught himself on the wall before he fell on top of Jaejoong, who was bright red, but staring at him with an annoyed expression.

"You call that a kiss?" he breathed, pulling Changmin down and pressing their lips together.

Changmin gasped and Jaejoong took the opportunity to deepen the kiss.

He couldn't believe what was happening...

Jaejoong moved his hands from his shirt and hooked them around the back of his neck, burying his hands in Changmin's hair, forcing him closer.

Changmin thought his heart might beat itself out of his chest and latch onto Jaejoong forever. He wasn't sure he cared.

Just as he thought, Jaejoong's lips were slightly chapped from the constant chewing, and the kiss was slightly clumsy. Like Jaejoong had never kissed anyone like this before...

The thought sent a wave of excitement coursing through him. He bent his arms so his elbows rested against the wall and his body pressed closer to Jaejoong, who tightened his hold around his neck with a small noise.

They finally pulled apart, just enough to catch their breath. Changmin could feel Jaejoong's breath against his lips. It took all his self-control not to kiss him again.

"Wow..." Jaejoong breathed.

Changmin swallowed and nodded. "Y-yeah..."

A small smile flickered across Jaejoong's lips as he pulled Changmin even closer, forcing him to move his arms around Jaejoong's waist and push his back against the wall so their bodies pressed completely together.

"And here I thought I would have to confess to you..." he let out a little laugh, making Changmin duck his head in embarrassment.

His insides were twisting and doing weird little back flips. Jaejoong liked him...he was going to confess...to Changmin...

"Changmin..."

He looked up at his name. Jaejoong was grinning. "Do you like me?"

He nodded slowly. He was pretty sure he'd forgotten how to speak.

Jaejoong's grin widened. "Good."

He leaned forward and kissed Changmin again.

"I never confessed to anyone before," Jaejoong laughed softly, pulling away again.

Changmin smiled back. He was confused and had no idea what was happening. If he was dreaming, and tomorrow he would come to school to find Jaejoong back to being just his friend. He had no idea if this meant he was dating Jaejoong, or if this was something they would never speak of again. And then there was Matsushita...he still bothered Changmin...the awkward air between him and Jaejoong wasn't normal, and he knew he would have to ask Jaejoong eventually...

But right now...he wanted to pretend that Jaejoong was his.

"I guess I should feel honored that the great Kim Jaejoong has confessed to me, then," he joked back.

Jaejoong's grin widened and he kissed Changmin again. "Yes. Because it will never happen again."

Changmin's heart leapt, and he couldn't keep himself from kissing Jaejoong again. God, he could kiss him forever...

"Good," he murmured against his lips, before one more quick kiss.

Jaejoong waited as he finished dressing, before they left the costume shop together. Changmin expected it to be awkward. Expected Jaejoong to tell Changmin that no one could know about what happened. But instead, he laced their fingers together as they walked down the hall and out to the front gate.

A few passerby glanced their way as they stopped just outside the gate, but most of their classmates had already gone home for the day.

"I'll...see you tomorrow," Jaejoong smiled shyly at him before kissing his cheek, and heading the opposite direction.

Changmin watched him go. A mixture of emotions running through him. He was happy - _beyond_ happy - but confused.

What did this mean? Was he dating Jaejoong? Were they going to walk around school acting like a couple? Did Jaejoong expect them to hide their relationship? Did they even have a relationship?

He had no idea if their classmates knew Jaejoong liked guys...and while girlish fantasies and fan fictions were one thing, to see it in reality was another...the same girls who followed him around asking for autographs and praising his designs could also turn on him the moment they found out he was dating a boy.

He turned over these thoughts the entire way home. When he had no appetite for dinner, he excused himself and texted Jaejoong the minute he was in his room, because it was completely unacceptable for him to turn down food. Almost a sin...

He had to know...

_7:45: So...are we dating?_

Straight forward and blunt. Just like the first day he spoke to Jaejoong. It seemed to be the only way to ever get through to him.

_7:46: ....aren't we?_

_7:46: Just making sure. See you tomorrow_

_7:47: Yunho will probably tell the entire school tomorrow..._

_7:48: Good._

Jaejoong sent several lines of heart emoticons in response. Grinning, Changmin replied with, "idiot" and a heart emoticon of his own, before setting his phone aside and opening his English text.

He hadn't realized just how hard he had fallen for Jaejoong until he looked at his notes after an hour and saw he had more "J's" doodled in the margin of his paper than practice sentences.


	14. Chapter 14

Changmin expected a lot of things the day after he apparently started officially dating Jaejoong. He braced himself for the stares, whispers, and even the glares shot his way as Jaejoong smiled widely and boldly kissed his cheek when they met just inside the school gates. He was a bit surprised - he didn't think Jaejoong would want to be so open about their new relationship - but he couldn't say he was complaining...he wanted everyone to know Jaejoong was his - even if he had to endure sneering remarks from half the boys at school.

"This ok?" Jaejoong asked a little shyly, sliding his hands down Changmin's arm and lacing their hands together.

Changmin smiled and squeezed his hand in reassurance as they walked to class. It was cute that Jaejoong worried.

"I'm more concerned about the hoards of girls who will be after my head for ruining their chances."

Jaejoong laughed and tried to hide his mouth with his other hand, but Changmin forced it away. "You should stop hiding your smile..."

"But it's ugly," Jaejoong whined back with a pout.

"I like your ugly smile."

"YAH!" Jaejoong laughed and tried to pull away as if he was offended, but Changmin just held his hand tighter and pulled him closer with a grin.

When Jaejoong's smile widened, Changmin's heart soared. _That_ was one smile he wanted to share with the world - Jaejoong, happy and confident and beautiful.

"HA!"

Yoochun's shout echoed gleefully through the classroom as they entered. Almost immediately, their classmates fell silent. Suddenly shy, Changmin released Jaejoong's hand and hurried to his seat, while avoiding everyone's gaze. Maybe this was going to be harder than he thought...

Jaejoong, always ready with a charming smile and a cheerful "Good morning!" seemed completely at ease as he strode to his desk. Several people whispered behind their hands to their neighbors, and Jaejoong stopped when a boy said made a particularly nasty comment.

He turned his idol-like smile to the boy, who immediately fell silent. "Sorry, didn't catch that."

The boy swallowed. Jaejoong could smile as much as he wanted - but his eyes were cold enough to send a chill through the entire classroom.

"Aw, Jae, leave the kid alone," Yoochun appeared next to his friend and slung an arm over his shoulder with a grin. "Not all of us are living in the 21st century and understand that love transcends gender."

Changmin snorted. Yoochun was probably the corniest person he'd ever met...but it was nice to know Jaejoong's friends -his friends- accepted and defended them.

Jaejoong slowly turned away from the petrified boy, and took a seat in front of Heechul who was looking miserable.

"What's your problem?" Jaejoong raised an eyebrow at him.

Heechul scowled at him and kicked his chair. "YOU!"

Changmin watched as Jaejoong stared at Heechul, clearly startled at his friend's behavior. He didn't know Heechul very well, but there was no way he had a problem with Jaejoong dating another guy...? Not when he clearly heard Yoochun saying something about one of the guys in class 3-C and Heechul being caught making out on the roof by their rather scandalized History teacher...

"I lost 10 bucks because of you!"

Jaejoong blinked. "What?"

Changmin's eyes moved to Yoochun, who had returned to his seat with a laugh and a rather smug grin. "Heechul bet that Jaejoong would graduate before the two of your realized how disgustingly obvious you've been...I said it would happen before Christmas...and after Matsushita ki-"

Changmin did not miss the sharp look Jaejoong threw at Yoochun that made him quickly shut his mouth. He laughed nervously. "I mean...after Matsushita started modeling...Changmin's jealousy was pretty obvious," he finished, sounding anything but convincing.

Jaejoong became oddly preoccupied with pulling his sketchbook out of his bag, and refused to look at Changmin.

Still eyeing Jaejoong, Changmin muttered, "I can't believe you two bet on us..."

"Not just us," Heechul said, "Junsu and Kyuhyun too..."

He sighed and turned to face the front of the room as their teacher walked in, and Jaejoong remained oblivious to his attempts at burning a hole through the side of his head.

Yoochun had definitely wanted to say something else about Matsushita...

He glanced over his shoulder again, but Jaejoong had his head bent so low over his sketchbook that his nose nearly touched the paper....was he purposely ignoring him?

He shook his head and turned back to the front. Maybe he was just being paranoid...

By lunch, he was so busy defending the food Jaejoong made him, from Yunho, Junsu, and Yoochun's thieving fingers, that he completely forgot about Matsushita. In fact, even as he headed towards the gym after school for one of the final dress rehearsals, the only thing on his mind was how he would tell Jaejoong that he had an audition at a modeling company over winter break. He was surprised his application even went through - he had no profile, and the only head-shots he had were from his school picture. He didn't want to tell anyone -especially Jaejoong- until he actually passed the initial application.

Their rehearsal today was in the gym, where a make-shift stage and runway were set up. He stopped just outside the curtains that lead to the changing area, and heard Yoochun speaking.

"So are you going to tell Changmin?"

He stilled. Tell him what?

Carefully, he moved closer to the curtain to hear better.

"Tell him what?"

That was Jaejoong...

Holding his breath, Changmin listened as Yoochun replied, "You want me to spell it out for you? Matsushita _kissed_ you, Jae."

Changmin could hear the amusement in Yoochun's voice. At least someone thought this was funny...because Changmin just felt cold.

He stood frozen in place, jealousy, anger, disappointment, and disbelief all vying for the top spot in his mind.

Matsushita kissed Jaejoong? Why didn't he say anything? _  
_

He heard Jaejoong groan, followed by the unmistakable sound of a chair scraping across the floor as he collapsed into it.

Ever since the news about Changmin and Jaejoong made its full course around the school, Matsushita had gone from being awkward around Jaejoong, to being almost completely silent. He still came to the fittings and rehearsals, but his smile was gone, and he wouldn't look at Jaejoong. A few times, Changmin thought he felt Matsushita's eyes on him, but every time he looked over, Matsushita would quickly look away again.

"God, Yoochun, _please_ I don't want to think about that...I feel so bad..."

Changmin scowled as Yoochun chuckled. "That you turned him down, or that he stole your first kiss?"

Unable to take any more, he ripped open the curtains, nearly tearing them off the flimsy poles.

Jaejoong's eyes widened as Changmin stalked towards him.

Yoochun laughed nervously. "C-Changmin...w-what a surprise..."

Changmin shot him a glare and Yoochun smiled back nervously as he inched towards the door. "I-I'm just...gonna....yeah - bye."

With Yoochun gone, Changmin turned towards Jaejoong who was looking horrified, nervous, and apologetic all at the same time. He watched as Jaejoong struggled to find something to say - an apology, an explanation that Changmin had misunderstood...maybe a plea to spare his life...

"Matsushita kissed you?" he asked, forcing his voice calm, though it probably would have been better to shout. The deadly calm only seemed to make Jaejoong shrink away from him.

Part of him knew he was overreacting. Matsushita may have kissed Jaejoong, but it was Changmin that had been walking around the halls with him all week. It was Changmin who was allowed to kiss and hold Jaejoong as much as he wanted...

But that didn't mean he wasn't pissed.

"C-Changmin-"

Jaejoong gave a little _'eep'_ as Changmin slammed his hands down on the arms of Jaejoong's chair, trapping him as he leaned close.

Matsushita had stolen Jaejoong's first kiss...something inside him burned with jealousy at the thought.

"How did he kiss you?" he asked in a low voice. He watched as red flooded across Jaejoong's cheeks.

"I-I-"

Changmin didn't give him a chance to answer. He crushed their lips together and moved his hands to the front of Jaejoong's uniform so he could pull him out of the chair. Jaejoong broke away briefly with a surprised yelp, but Changmin forced their lips together again. Jaejoong made another startled noise, but it turned into a small moan as Changmin's tongue swiped at his bottom lip.

The kiss turned slow and languid and Changmin finally started to relax. When they pulled away, they stayed close, small pants playing against the others lips as they caught their breath.

"D-definitely...not like that..." Jaejoong breathed. "Want to guess again?"

Changmin scowled. "This isn't funny, Jae."

Jaejoong grinned, pecked his lips, and pushed away, out of Changmin's arms before he had the chance to protest.

"It was like that, you jealous brat," he laughed when Changmin continued to glower at him.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Jaejoong actually looked a bit guilty and bit his lip. "I should have...sorry...I just...wanted to talk to Yuya properly first...and I knew you would get jealous..."

Well, that was true...but Changmin was more annoyed that Matsushita had stolen Jaejoong's first kiss.

He sighed, and pulled Jaejoong into a hug. Jaejoong returned it with a small sigh as Changmin rested his chin on his shoulder. He wanted to tell Jaejoong that even if he wasn't the first, he would be the last. He wanted to be first and the last for everything. But it was too soon for that. Too soon to admit out loud. Even too soon for him to admit to himself. And definitely too soon to admit to Jaejoong.

So he just gave him a quick, tight squeeze, before pulling away with a grin. "Should I tell Yoochun he can stop hiding behind the curtains?"

Jaejoong laughed and nodded as they heard a soft curse from where Yoochun had supposedly left.

The other models soon arrived, and as Changmin watched Jaejoong, he couldn't help but imagine a future with Jaejoong flitting between the most sought-after celebrities, ensuring their outfits were perfect before they headed in front of the cameras to show off his designs. It was a future Changmin saw himself in.            


	15. Chapter 15

Finally, the day of the fashion show arrived. Jaejoong watched with mild amusement as Changmin fidgeted restlessly around the small backstage area; he was more nervous than Jaejoong expected. He paced back and forth, sometimes pausing long enough to peak through the curtains to see the slowly growing audience, before resuming his pacing again.

After several failed attempts to make him sit still and calm down, Jaejoong resigned himself to helping the other models get ready, and only threw occasional glances at Changmin to make sure he didn't run away.

"Ready?" He asked as their music teacher, who always helped with the fashion show, stepped up on stage to begin the introduction.

Changmin's eyes widened, and for a moment Jaejoong thought he was going to say it was impossible and Jaejoong would have to do the show without him. Instead, he visibly shook himself, and swallowed before nodding.

"Y-yeah..."

Jaejoong smiled and adjusted the collar of his shirt. "You're gorgeous Changmin-ah."

His smiled widened when Changmin blushed and looked away from him, mumbling something that Jaejoong couldn't quite catch. With one last word of reassurance, he left to make sure Yunho and Ara were ready - they would be the first on stage, followed by Changmin and Nana. Yunho and Ara would model a second outfit after that, then again Changmin and Nana would follow, before Yuya and Min Ah kicked off the finale.

Jaejoong felt a little guilty as he watched Yuya stride out on stage with a confidence Jaejoong only saw when he was dancing. He had been so busy getting ready for the show that he still hadn't talked to Yuya properly. Admittedly, Jaejoong had been worried about the performance - Yuya was quiet and oddly reserved in the days leading up to the show - but as he strode out to the edge of the runway, Jaejoong's worries eased considerably. Yuya could have quit. Could have let Jaejoong do the fashion show without him. But he showed up like always, practiced, and stood patiently for the final fittings. The only difference was the lack of smiles and laughter.

He watched Yuya and Min Ah turn from the end of the runway and stride back towards him, just like any model would, acting as if they were returning backstage. Then they froze, like an invisible force was pulling them back to the runway. Even though the dance was only a minute long, somehow, Yuya managed to make the choreography brilliant and captivating.

They finished with a roar of approval, and exited the stage. The audience was still clapping when Yunho and Ara went to stage for their finale.

Jaejoong beamed at the pair as they walked towards him. Min Ah was bouncing with excitement, and Yuya's face was flushed with happiness as he smiled at Jaejoong.

"You were perfect!" he threw his arms around Yuya, who froze.

Jaejoong stepped away quickly, suddenly feeling apologetic as an awkward air hung between them. "S-sorry...you two were great though," he smiled. "Thank you for doing it."

Yuya just smiled shyly and said, "It was nothing," as Min Ah bounced even more excitedly and exclaimed that it was the best day of her life.

Jaejoong bit his lip as they fell into silence. He really wanted to say something...anything...like an apology...or maybe to beg Yuya to forgive him and return to the same bright smiling person Jaejoong first met. They had so much in common, it would be devastating to lose Yuya's friendship.

"Really I-"

Something soft hurled into the back of his head.

Startled, he turned to see Changmin scowling at him. He looked down at the thing that was thrown at him, and saw the green scarf he had intended to give Changmin at the end of the fashion show. He left it hanging on one of the racks because he had been debating with himself all morning whether to just let Changmin wear it with the final outfit...

"What was that for?!" He picked up his precious creation and chucked it back at Changmin, who snatched it out of the air.

Yuya coughed awkwardly behind him. "I-I'll...talk to you later, Jaejoong-nii...i-if you still want to borrow my L'arc~en~ciel DVD..." the moment Changmin's scowled deepened, he quickly added, "Or-you-and-Changmin-can-come-over-and-watch-or-not-and-yeah-bye."

Jaejoong glared reproachfully at Changmin, who looked unrepentant.

"What's your problem?"

He didn't have time for Changmin's jealous fits right now...he could hear the audience cheer as Yunho and Ara finished their portion. Soon their teacher would be getting on stage to announce the Changmin and Nana's finale...

Changmin held up the scarf. "Let me wear this."

Jaejoong blinked. His heart skipped several beats, his stomach fluttered in excitement, and he had the intense urge to start bouncing like Min Ah.

He was mad at Changmin. He couldn't just say yes because he would give Changmin anything.

"It doesn't go with your outfit." He probably would sound more convincing if his voice wasn't shaking and his lips weren't twitching with the need to smile.

"It's green. My outfit is brown and green."

Fair point.

Their teacher was just beginning to announce the finale, and he could see Nana waving at him impatiently, over Changmin's shoulder.

Instead of telling Changmin to shut up and listen to him, he said, "Call me hyung-nim." His lips finally quirked into a smirk.

There was a long pause as Changmin stared at him with a blank expression.

He flung the scarf at Jaejoong. It landed on his head and covered half his face so he was looking at Changmin with only one eye.

"I don't need it."

Jaejoong watched as he turned to join Nana, dumbstruck, but only for a moment. Regaining his senses, he ripped off the scarf and flung it over Changmin's head so it caught around his neck

Changmin gave a startled shout as Jaejoong yanked him backwards by the ends of the scarf.

"What the-!"

Changmin spun around angrily. At the same time, Jaejoong looped the scarf around his neck one more time so the ends fell neatly over his shoulders. Without letting go, he leaned up and kissed Changmin before he could protest.

He smiled after pulling away, his hands still gripping the scarf.

"Perfect."


End file.
